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TTC baby #1...start Clomid 5/29...buddy??

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  • dragonflinursedragonflinurse Posts: 116
    Hey ladies!! Sorry it's been a few days. I'm on vacation in DC visiting my brother and his wife. It's been great! Nice to get away from work. I was happy to stop being obsessed with getting pregnant for a few days, but I'm ready to try my next cycle!!

    Katrin - how are you doing? Keep your chin up!! This will happen for all of us...just have faith!! I know you are frustrated but when the time is right, it will happen!!! The other day when I realized it wasn't going to happen this cycle, I went to a friends house to have a couple drinks. While I was there, her husband had a major hypoglycemic episode and could have possibly died. They have only known he is a diabetic for a very short period of time. I'm a nurse and I was able to help them out. I guess my point is just timing...everything happens for a reason and I think for me, that was the reason. Just don't lose hope!!

    Sweetheart - I chose a donor similar looking to me. It was important that he is smart, artistic or musical and athletic. Heis all of the above and good looking to boot!! #13403 is mine...hoping his numbers are good!

    Mom2b - excited for you!! Fingers and toes crossed for you!! I'm here for you during this 2WW!!

    Amy - you too need to keep the faith!! You are giving great advice to visualize...you do the same thing!! :) I just think positivity and faith go a long way!!

    Highlyfavored - keep us in the loop! Let us know about your appt for US.

    That goes for all you ladies!! Keep us posted and I'm here for all of you!! You can also email me at dragonflinurse@gmail.com

    I get home on Thursday. Maybe I will start period that day and I get catch up with you girls!!

    Positive energy, prayers and baby dust to us all!!

    Jennie
  • highlyfavoredhighlyfavored Posts: 61
    Hey ladies well I just got back from spending 5 days with my family so that helped to pass some time. My doc was on vacation last week as well so I called her today and I am scheduled for an U/S Friday morning then I will see her afterwards. I'm excited because I only did 25mg of Clomid this time and am hopeful that this month is a go.

    I need some suggestions or advice or whatever you want to call it. I am in a position to either go with IUI or with a friend of mine. I want my baby to know their father and I kind of don't want to share a father with 24 other families times however many childen. I know it sounds selfish but it is what it is. With that being said I know that IUI is putting the sperm directly into the uterus which increases the chances exponentially but I want to know if I should go with IUI from a donor or timed sex from this friend since my doc will not place his sperm directly into my uterus for fear of passing on any type of infection or anything else. I am aware that I would have his sperm washed. So ladies any feedback is welcomed. And I hope I didn't confuse anyone, like I have already confused myself:)

    Best wishes and Baby Dust to us all!!!
  • highlyfavoredhighlyfavored Posts: 61
    apologies I meant I am aware that I could have his sperm washed and tested for stds.
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    Highlyfavored It is really up to you. Awhile back we had this discussion about friends versus someone else.

    In today's world there are more legal ramifications with a friend. Not sure if you heard of the case in the midwest, a woman used a friends sperm and the family lost her job or something like that and the biological father was ordered to pay child support and it was backdated or something like that. The father has no role in the childs life. Also if you use a friend how intrusive will he be in your life and child's life in raising the child.

    Also will you have a complete medical history of your friend? Genetic testing etc? CA Cryobank tests the donor's sperm for a variety of diseases and gives us a complete medical history. I used a donor from here, I know there were confirmed pregnancies but I have not found any of his offspring. I have a complete medical history as well as a copy of the genetic tests that were run on him.

    It really ultimately is up to you. But with Cryobank the child is yours 100% and you don't have to share.

    If you end up using a friend I would get a lawyer involved so you spell out that he is only donating sperm, and has no role in the child's life, that you don't put him on the birth certificate, you won't ask for child support etc.

    Good luck with your decision.
  • highlyfavoredhighlyfavored Posts: 61
    Thank you again AnissaS but as I said before I want my child to know their father. And we have already discussed child support and all of that. Which is not an option because I will not be seeking that. My ONLY goal is to have a child and the only delay is deciding on a donor or someone that my child can see whenever they "want" instead of one time when they turn 18yrs old. As far as all of the testing there is no difference than if I never used a donor and were using a husband or boyfriend. Who is out there running genetic tests on people that they fall in love with or is having sex with (not many people). Also unfortunately the selection of African American donors at these banks are slim pickings so if I don't want to complicate things even more in my child's life I may need to go with the friend. Once again feedback from other perspectives besides the MINE MINE MINE perspective would be greatly appreciated. I'm thinking of what kind of life would be best for my child as far as relating and recognizing where they came from. Maybe I'm on the wrong forum. I'll just wait until Friday and get my doctor's opinion I guess.
  • mom2b721mom2b721 Posts: 23
    Highlyfavored - go with your gut. If you have doubts about using a donor, then it probably isn't the best route for you to go. In my situation, I have enough males in my family and friendship circle, that I feel confident that my child will have male role models and father figures growing up that he/she will not be deprived of a "father". Whatever you decide, let it be the best decision for you. There are no wrong or right way to have a baby these days.

    Feeling good on day 4 of my 2WW. Not feeling pregnant but feeling different than I did at this same point last time around. Hopefully that means something. Hang in there fellow 2WW'ers. Best wishes and hugs to all!
  • SweetthearttSweettheartt Posts: 373
    Went to the dr today. Three good follicles possibly four. Insemination probably this weekend. Does anyone else worry about triplets or quads?
  • katrinlkatrinl Posts: 41
    Jennie, thank you for the kind words ! Have not lost hope at this point, especially since my MD agreed to do a 4th IUI in case this one did not work. Am trying to take it all as it comes at me. Have been doing amazingly well with it after the big disappointment initially. Have no control over it and instead of letting it making me upset decided to try hard to make the best of it and stay busy.

    Amy: Hope you are doing ok. As far as symptoms : none on my end. You feeling any different.?Hope not only that garden is growing beautiful creations :-)

    Mom2b721: Glad you are feeling ok. For my 2 2ww, I found the second week was the toughest so hang in!

    Sweetheart: wonderful to have 3-4 follicles. I do not worry too much about triplets or quads since I am sure this "older" body would not be producing so many high quality eggs.

    Anissa: thank you for not letting me beat myself up. I needed to hear those words that day !

    To all you ladies: lots of baby dust and good luck on this journey !
  • dragonflinursedragonflinurse Posts: 116
    Highly - I agree with mom2b...go with your gut. You know what is important to you. That's all that matters.

    Mom2b - hang in there!! Praying this will be the last 2WW you have to do!!

    Sweetheart - its funny...I was just thinking about asking my RE about increasing my Clomid dose. Both times I've taken it, my dose was 50mg and I've only produced two follicles. I want more!!. My sister-in-law who is now pregnant via IVF said to talk to him. I've been feeling so positive and ow after talking to her, I'm doubting stuff. I almost wish I never talked to her about it. Every woman is different and I guess I should have faith that my RE knows what's best for me. Im not sure why I'm not worried about multiples, but I'm not. I guess I figure God will give me what I can handle.

    Amy- how are you feeling in your second week of 2WW?

    I'm constantly praying and hoping for all of you ladies!!

    Jennie :)
  • SweetthearttSweettheartt Posts: 373
    Jennie-
    Your donor 13403 had the MOST ADORABLE infant photo on this whole site. I had noticed it early on. Absolutely precious.
    Don't worry about two follicles not being enough. My cousin ended up with one and it took the first time and she is 41 and a half.
  • dragonflinursedragonflinurse Posts: 116
    Sweetheart - thanks!!! I just checked your donor out and what a cutie!! :) Looks like we both picked some good ones! I have green eyes and I'm pretty tall (5'9"), so I was started off looking for a donor with the same physical traits and went from there. So is this your first round of meds and IUI? Do multiples run in your family?
  • highlyfavoredhighlyfavored Posts: 61
    Thx for the feedback ladies. If the 2ww is anything like this wait for the U/S then I'm in trouble. Friday can't get here quick enough. Glad I have an early morning appt. Praying that all goes well.
  • Babyin2014Babyin2014 Posts: 63
    Hi all,

    Been thinking about you and am glad to see that you are doing well. This TWW is killing me! I want to POAS right now!!!

    Amy, 42
    IUI #1 June 3, 2013
  • SweetthearttSweettheartt Posts: 373
    Hi All,
    Jennie-
    Yes multiples run in my family. Twins every generation, but I am more concerned with the Clomid factor for triplets. Yes, first IUI, should get my trigger shot tomorrow.

    I thought this may be interesting to report to this group of ladies.
    Between my acupuncturist and my dr they say to avoid the following foods: caffeine, dairy, peas, corn products, pears, soy products, tomatoes and potatoes.
  • dragonflinursedragonflinurse Posts: 116
    Amy - ahhhhh!!! I want you to POAS too!! I'm living vicariously through you ladies :) I'm home from DC and just waiting on AF to show her ugly face so I can get started. I'm praying she visits me (just this month) and stays away from you!!

    Sweetheart- hang in there. Good luck with trigger and IUI. Let us know how you are feeling this weekend!!

    Super sticky baby dust to us all!!!

    Jennie :))
  • katrinlkatrinl Posts: 41
    How are you ladies doing? Still no symptoms except the ones I get from the Progesteron. Wishing this 2 week wait was over !
    Baby dust to all !!
  • SweetthearttSweettheartt Posts: 373
    Turns out IUI will take place Monday and Tuesday. Three good follicles and one little one still there. Getting excited, but a little nervous. This will be my first go!

    Good luck to all in the 2WW hoping you get a positive. Keep us posted!
  • highlyfavoredhighlyfavored Posts: 61
    Congrats Sweettheartt. I go in tomorrow afternoon for my 1st IUI. I will post when I get through. I'm nervous as well. Don't really know what to expect. There are 3 of us who are doing this in the next 3 or 4 days and I wish blessings on you all.
  • highlyfavoredhighlyfavored Posts: 61
    Just had 1st IUI. It was about the same as having a pap smear. There was the feeling of a pinch or something related to how it feels if you have ever had an airsonohysterogram and the shoot the air into your tubes to make sure they are open. Doc had me lay on the table afterwards with no movement (not even my head) with my legs up. Doc wasn't too happy with the swim team. She said they met the bank's criteria but they weren't as fast as she wanted them so if this round doesn't work then I need to change donors. But I have faith this is gonna work. She says my uterus was wide open and I felt my egg release this morning (I think...lol). Other than the swimmers not being up to her speed she said everything else looked GREAT!!!

    So here I am in the 2WW!!! Gotta find something to occupy my time.
  • SweetthearttSweettheartt Posts: 373
    Thanks for the info. since I will go through it tomorrow for the first time. Interesting. Which donor did you end up using so I know to avoid him if I need to make a switch?
  • Babyin2014Babyin2014 Posts: 63
    Period came yesterday.
    Love to all you other ladies.
    Amy
  • katrinlkatrinl Posts: 41
    Amy,
    Big support hug ! This is hard, no matter how hard you try to prepare yourself, it still is a tough one ! I remember last one, I really felt like my body failed me, Hope you are managing ok ! Know we are here to support you !
  • highlyfavoredhighlyfavored Posts: 61
    Ok sweetheart let me start off by saying I am one of the few African Americans on this board. So unless I'm assuming incorrectly there is a slim chance that you would be using him. Although I do know that it is also very likely that you could be using him. Please don't take offense because I said that in fun. I used 12929. But just to make it clear that I meant no harm I'm looking at another donor that is outside of my race and I would just have to deal with the questions when and if they came up. I just want a healthy happy baby and I'm willing to cross the color line to get my baby.

    Good luck on your procedure

    I hope this msg isn't taken the wrong way.
  • SweetthearttSweettheartt Posts: 373
    Not taken the wrong way at all. Yes, use whatever donor has the qualities that you are looking for in a person. I am one of the few that didn't pick someone who looked like me. I have dark hair and light eyes and I chose a blond. I chose someone who looked more like my father and brother-in-law. The way genes mix is so unpredictable anyway. I was more interested in someone who was intelligent and enjoyed singing and was tall. I also liked that my donor was a writer because that is my talent too.
  • dragonflinursedragonflinurse Posts: 116
    Amy girl....HUGE HUGS!!!!! I know you are devastated. Just remember just like the "normal" way of getting pregnant, it usually takes more than one cycle. It totally sucks because we are spending lots of money and we are all jacked up on meds/hormones. Know that we are all here to support you through this whole process. Chin up, my friend....

    Jennie
  • Babyin2014Babyin2014 Posts: 63
    Thanks Jennie, I appreciate the support. I've been pretty down since Saturday, but am trying again right away. Went in for US today and my ovaries looked good, so we're moving forward. Hope this time a baby will be created!

    How is everyone else holding up during their TWW?

    Amy
  • highlyfavoredhighlyfavored Posts: 61
    Thanx sweetheart Never know how things will be interpreted when you put it in writing vs verbally. It was a rush decision on my donor. When my doctor told me it was a go for the next day I had to rush and get someone shipped. I had narrowed it down to 6 donors, 2 of which had a different background than myself. So you are right as long as they have the type of personality that I am looking for then the color of their skin should not matter. I have so many shades of brown that in reality any child I had with any person could come out with any number of complexions. My paternal grandmother looks so much like a Caucasian vs her younger brother looking completely African American that I had to ask her if she was mixed. She just smiled and told me a story of another time when someone said she was not 100% African American.
    I said all of that to say this that if I have to go with someone completely outside of my race then so be it. I just want MY BABY!!! LOL

    So good luck on this whole process to you and everyone that is going through this. It can be stressful in and of itself. Not counting the effects from the meds.

    God bless and baby dust!!!
  • highlyfavoredhighlyfavored Posts: 61
    Amy I know what you are going thru I have had 2m/c years ago. Don't want to go thru that again. That's kind of why I don't want to test too early. My thoughts and prayers are with all of us.
    I just keep imagining what it will be like when I am holding my LO.

    Good Luck and God Bless
  • SweetthearttSweettheartt Posts: 373
    First prayers go out to Amy. Much love from the board to you.

    I have been waiting all day to tell you girls of my very first IUI.
    I am working with a top doctor in his field in NY. So supposedly he really knows what he is doing and has developed techniques/inventions in his field, so I am excited to have him as a doctor. You should see the waiting room so PACKED.

    The nurse came in first and she told me my donor 13426 scores were FANTASTIC, really incredible. Premium motility and lots of sperm.

    Then my doctor came in and told me that the sperm were moving "like crazy" and that was a good sign for virility. He said I picked a good one, so I was psyched about that.
    He was very positive about the way I looked with 3-4 eggs and good uterine lining and between that and the highly active sperm and tons of them he seemed very enthusiastic.
    After he did the insemination he had me get up right away. He said lying there was a myth and it doesn't make a difference. That surprised me because it seemed everyone else lays there for a while.
    He will do the second vial on Wednesday. There was a little bleeding, which I didn't expect. All in all, I am really hoping it takes the first time. Who really knows since I have never been pregnant before?
  • mom2b721mom2b721 Posts: 23
    Hi everyone!

    I've been keeping up with everyone's posts. Amy, hugs to you. It's not easy. This whole process isn't easy, but the disappointment of not conceiving after so much time, money, discomfort and energy put into it is the worst.

    I'm on day 10 of my 2 week wait. I feel "great". Completely normal - good, bad, who knows? I did notice some breast tenderness this evening so I'm hoping that means something. I couldn't resist the urge to pee on a stick and tested negative sunday morning. I know that it was truly too early to expect a positive, but I couldn't help myself....although it was discouraging and did more harm than good really.

    Good luck to those of you just starting/getting ready to start their 2 WW. Lots of love and baby dust to all!
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