Looking to connect with other single moms by choice

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  • Hello Everyone!

    I embarked on this journey on Sept 2014 and I just had my first IUI a few hours ago!!! I'm super excited and need all the good vibes and baby dust you ladies can send my way....

    I'm 41 and like most of you, I'm also a princess who's Prince Charming must have taken a wrong turn in some far away forest! lololol The day he'll stop for directions and finds me, he'll have an instant family!!!! lololol

    I have a second round at this tomorrow... the eggs hadn't completely released so I will be inseminated again tomorrow to increase my chances... Send all the prayers you can generate, this way... I will do the same for all of you!

    Tons of Baby Dust sent your way! :)
  • Hi everyone,

    Just wanted to update you all and let you know my pregnancy test came back today negative. Failed IUI x3 for me. Moving on to IVF now. I'll keep you all posted on my adventure.
  • For any of you that don't know about this yet, theres an AMAZING and supportive private facebook group that is all women that used California cryobank. It's call CCB Friends. I highly recommend you look it up and join! It's the greatest resource and support group and there are tons of women just like us! See you over there!

    -Kelly
  • Hi Chase,

    I'm 33 years old and I will be having my very first IUI next week. I also had the same question you had about it working with 3 or less IUI's. I truly hope it does! Bestvof luck to the both of us!
  • Hi Everyone,

    I'm 33 and also a single mother by choice as I'm a single lesbian woman. I decided to embark on this journey over the summer. My doctor had me track my ovulation for several months and I'm extremely excited to say I'm finally going to be inseminated via iui next week! I'm so nervous! When I told my mom what I wanted to do, she thought I was crazy. She actually still thinks I am. I really wish I had her support but unfortunately she is very "old fashioned" and just doesn't understand it. Thank God I have the support of my friends so I don't feel so alone. Wish me luck everyone!

    P.s. I in NYC...
  • Good Luck!! Moms can be tough, but she may come around once she knows she has a grandchild on the way! My mom is old fashioned too and her first reaction to my decision was not so great. Support from other family members, my friends and coworkers has been amazing! Now my mom is helping my friends plan my baby shower and is very supportive! She is going to be my birth coach and we start classes in February :) I am also having a Doula just in case my mom makes me crazy while im in labor ;) lol! Wishing you lots of baby dust from NJ!!
  • Hi jenn0977 and Erodriguez1215,

    I am in Rockland County, NY and will be doing this on my own as well. I am a 39 y/o single woman and just haven't met the right guy as yet. Have decided not to wait any longer. Where did you guys go for your IUIs? I am trying to find a RE here and any recommendation if any would be great. Hoping to talk to a RE next month to get things started.

    Good luck to both of you.
  • Jenn - Thanks so much for your encouraging words! I hope she comes around too! Good luck with everything ??

    Hilda - My gynecologist office actually had someone who specializes in inseminations so I lucked out! It's in Soho though so it may be too far for you! Best of luck!

    Elizabeth
  • HildaU go to Dr. Zalman Levine of the Fertility Institute of Westwood, NJ. All my Rockland County friends went there and have babies. I hear he is absolutely wonderful and super caring. Very well-educated and cutting edge. Staff wonderful to work with. Phone number 201-666-4200. Make an appt. I know three people who raved about him.
  • Hildau - I live in Central NJ so my RE isn't too far from my home/work. His name is Dr. Zeigler amd i was onviously very happy with the practice! He has multiple offices, but probably still a bit far for you especially with early morning blood work and multiple visits per week when you get close to your IUI.

    Best wishes and lots of baby dust!!

    Jenn
  • Hello all! I live in California and so ready to be a mom! It is amazing seeing all of the support here. I am so blessed to have a wonderful family that is very supportive of my decision to do this on my own. Granted that doesn't mean I'm not nervous because I am, but I'm so excited to begin this great adventure. I just turned 35 and am beyond ready to hold my own little one in my arms. I will be going for my first IUI at the end of March.

    Lots of luck to you all…

    Amber :)
  • My IUI appt is tomorrow! I'm so nervous! Anyone out there have any advice for me! I need lots of happy thoughts and BABY DUST ladies ??
  • I'm 42 and a SMBC. I also only purchased 3 vials and the third time was the charm. I delivered a beautiful baby girl in December. She is a treasure beyond belief. I was torn on my third attempt about not trying again if it didn't work and considered buying more. My siblings were all very supportive and were with me in the process from day one. My parents were a little more apprehensive about my being a single mother but were supportive once they knew I was successful. Good luck and please feel free to message if you have any questions. Best decision I've ever made!
  • It is so helpful to read all these posts and feel less isolated as a result. All of my friends have been super supportive with one exception. And my father, my only living family member is warming up to all of this. Without exception, everyone supports the idea of a donor - the freedom and ability to make decisions without negotiating the details for pediatricians, schools, house rules etc. Some of my married friends have moments of jealousy when they think about not having to negotiate every decision.

    I turned 40 in January and like so many of your, realized I couldn't wait for the right person any more if I wanted to have my own children. I could be 60 by the time they ask for the right directions... And so I am at the very beginning of this process.

    At 40 it is so different, being treated automatically like you are potentially infertile. I am thankful to be through most of the insane amount of tests that are conducted and so far, it looks positive and that there will be no issues conceiving.

    I am based in NYC and look forward to hearing everyones' updates and going through this process. I love the idea of keeping a journal to document starting from the first dr visit.

    Thank you all.
  • Hi ladies,.. im hoping to be mom soon as well. im 32 and about to do my 2nd iui next month. my first ended in a early MC. anyone in ga?
  • Hi everyone,

    I'm 37 single FTM and I'm almost 7 months. I have been open and honest about what I am doing from my family to co-workers and everyone is supportive. I tell them that I'm ready to be a mom and I'm sick of waiting for the right person to share it with. I always joke that I don't have to deal with in-laws and I don't need to negotiate on how I am going to raise my child. I have not run into any negativity at all. I plan on being completely open with the baby and I chose an open donor which gives the baby an opportunity to reach out to his father if he wants. This has been the best decision of my life! Henry Shea due July 2015 :)
  • Hi Ladies!

    I am 24, finishing out my last year of college, and planning to become a SMC!

    Woah buddy! I bet I sound crazy to some of you. haha.

    Anyway, I've worked with kids for as long as I remember and I've been a nanny for 7 years now. I'm hoping to be pregnant my last year of school so that I have the summer as my 'maternity leave'.

    I tried an ICI with a known donor once before but decided to switch to an IUI instead. I won't be TTC until September 2015.

    If anyone is interested, you can find me and follow my journey on instagram @: https://instagram.com/ttc.a.lil.asskicker/
  • I'm a single 37 year old who is crying after reading this and feel like I share a common story with everyone. I waited for Mr right but always end up with mr wrong.lol I have to have a hysterectomy as soon due to family history of ovarian cancer. I'm so nervous it will take more than 2-3 tries as that's the expense and time frame I'm being allowed. Super excited about being a mommy but nervous. You ladies sound amazing!
  • Hi! I am single and chose to do IUI with a donor also. I'm 32 and currently 11 weeks pregnant. It worked on the first try! I'm not gonna lie, I've definitely had my freak out moments and my "what the hell have i done" moments. But so far, I'm trucking along and doing well.
  • Hi,

    I too am on the SMBC journey. I'm soon to be 39 (August) and had by 3rd IUI in April. I decided to take April-July off to do acupuncture (which I've come to love), a better diet and more exercise. My tests were all better than average for my age so I'm hopeful. I'm in NJ and would love to connect with those in the area or we can just email each other.
    My email is: babblesbaublesbaby@gmail.com
  • Hi! I'm a single mom by choice. My story is a little different because I would never CONSIDER giving 50% of the legal rights of my child to someone else if I could possibly avoid it! That seems crazy! I can't believe men have been getting away with that racket for so long. We have something THEY need, not the other way around! While I joke that a couple of beers, a fake name, a smile, and a key card at a conference would be more affordable, more effective and potentially more fun, I am so glad companies like this exist to give me "safe" choices.

    Now I have a mind bending legal question. I buy sperm. Then I am the legal owner of that sperm/DNA, right? I produce (or buy) an egg. I am the legal owner of that egg/DNA as well. So am I not both the legal father (my sperm) and the legal mother (my egg)? I wonder if anyone has ever challenged this under property law.

    I see many people post about storing vials for subsequent pregnancies. Try to remember that you are 100% of your kid's parent, any child that comes after will also be 100% your child; therefore, they are 100% siblings. We have dropped men from our families, why not drop the fascination with the DNA too? If a better quality potential sperm was available two years later when you tried to conceive again, would you opt for something less than the best quality for your second child?

    Probably not the introduction you were looking for, but I'm in a cranky mood right now. I'll blame hormones.
  • Afternoon!!!! This was the exact post I needed to read, I felt I was weird, different for wanting to do this, but after seeing all of your posts, I realize I am not alone!!!!....I was 28 when I decided that if I was single at 30, I was using a donor and having a baby. Right before my 30th birthday I started telling a few people, I suppose feeling them out to see who's support I had. When I turned 30, I guess I just felt not ready, or scared. I am now 31.5 and READY! I talked to my Doctor, and most friends and family. And although they may not all agree with me, they all support me. In fact, I even get to bring "Lil Me" to work, my boss has agreed to create a "Nursery" area. People I didn't think would support me, do! It's great! I talked to one of my friends recently, (Who supports but doesn't necessarily agree) and I told her I was scared, and her response was awesome - "That fear doesn't ever go away, even if you are married. So if you don't do it now because you are scared, you will never do it". I have my first consultation July 3rd. I am expecting my cycle to start within the next few days, and will have my first IUI August/September.

    I have my whole life to find Mr.Right...But I don't have my whole life to have children! My Journey Starts Now!
  • @doingitalone. I love that last statement!
  • @KBT Thank you!!!! It's how I feel....Society tells you's that you need to be married, then have a baby...But this is 2015 - we have independent woman who don't want to just rush to settle down to have that baby....So, I wanted to spice up my life...Baby first, then I can focus on Mr.Right.
  • Am I missing something? How do you know the counts of the donor?? I don't see it on the donor page...Where do I need to look??
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