Just Starting This Journey

melissamrmelissamr Posts: 13
in Single Mothers by Choice
I've finally decided to start my journey to become a mother. I'm a single 36 year old, successful professional. I've always wanted to become a mother and have children. Unfortunately, I haven't been lucky enough to meet the perfect guy. So, after much thought and research, I've decided to start this journey on my own.

I've found a good ER doctor near where I live and work. I just finished selecting the sperm donor to move forward with and purchased 4 vials to start. I will be doing IUI and will do the first session this month. I'm nervous, scared, and so excited all at the same time!
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Comments

  • austingurlaustingurl Posts: 202
    Good luck!!! We are all nervous, scared, and excited so you have definitely come to the right place. Everyone on the boards is great. Feel free to ask any questions and share any thoughts. I think you can find posts from all of us venting frustrations and sharing excitement when someone gets a BFP. So, good luck starting the journey.
  • nettibugnettibug Posts: 118
    Welcome and good luck, melissamr!
  • jaimecjaimec Posts: 329
    welcome and good luck!! this message board is a lifeline for single mothers by choice....everyone "thinks" they understand how you feel, but we really do!! my biggest piece of advice would be to be patient. every factor can be perfect but it's not all about science....it just has to be the right time.
  • melissamrmelissamr Posts: 13
    Thanks you all so much for welcoming me and the words of advice! I need all of the support and advice that I can get!
  • eeh876eeh876 Posts: 168
    Welcome, melissamr!

    I second jaimec's advice. Most of us on here had to give it a few tries (and some are still trying). Now, with the support of this board, many of us have gotten to share exciting news with the group. :-) So take a deep breath and (try to) relax. I know, easier said than done.

    It's all worth it in the end, and we're here for you.

    Good luck!
  • dzamybdzamyb Posts: 19
    Hi
    I am also a 36 year old that is starting this process this month. Finally decided I can't keep hoping to meet the right guy. I just picked out my sperm donor and ordered. Scary, but exciting. I also just told my family what I am planning to do.

    Good Luck and keep us posted on your journy.
  • melissamrmelissamr Posts: 13
    I'm definitely excited for this journey! Had my first appt with my RE for this cycle today. It is Day 4 of my cycle and I'm going to do IUI this cycle. This will be my first time and I'm definitely anxious to try this process out. I'm using Clomid for this first try.

    Dzamyb - It sounds like we are going down very similar paths. Good for you deciding to move forward with having a baby at this point in your life! I wish you the best of luck on this journey and lots of baby dust! Keep us posted on your journey.
  • mathgeekmathgeek Posts: 9
    hello single ladies...
    I've found so much support through this process by reading these posts. I haven't had much to add as of yet, but hope to contribute more as I restart this journey. I'm 40 and started this process in February. I had three IUI cycles and got a BFP on the third try. It didn't last too long, however, so I'm gearing up to start again this month, hopefully.

    good luck to you all on the journey. Baby dust to you all.
  • lkeelslkeels Posts: 1
    Wow! It is good to know there are others out there. I am 36 as well and have not met anyone. Only I found out that I have infertility issues and will need fertility drugs as well. So since I found out last year I am really needing to get the ball rolling. The good news is that I have good coverage for the medicines. Two of my friends had to do IVF. ONe was 43 and had twins and one was a bit younger as her husband had fertility issues and she ended up having to reduce from triplets and she basically said that the drugs took a toll on her body. I am really hoping that I have some success at this. Any advice?
  • aagemaaagema Posts: 11
    Melissamr.....You took the words right out of my mouth! I am also 36 years old, single, and have not met the right guy. I probably started thinking about this 3-4 years ago, but didn't really start "looking into it" until last year. Tomorrow morning I am getting my first IUI!!!!! I feel the same...anxious, nervous, excited!!!! My family is super excited for me!! I am a little nervous how others will respond....I am a teacher, so I'm not sure how co-workers, administration, and especially parents will feel about this. However, I know this is the absolute right decision for me, so I'm ready!!!! Good luck to you all!!!
  • 21tdd21tdd Posts: 58
    Good Luck to you aagema!! Don't worry how others will respond. You have to follow your heart and reach for your goals and dreams. Don't let anyone take this joy and pleasure away from you simply because you are strong enough to know you CAN do it on your own!!

    Baby dust to you!
  • eeh876eeh876 Posts: 168
    Good luck, aagema! I'm a single teacher too, and I worried about the response from school as well- you don't pick all of those people to be in your life, so you never know how it is going to play out. Someone told me they will either be happy for you or keep their mouths shut, and they were right. I'm 30 weeks along now, and have had nothing but support from everyone, including the parents (even the super conservative ones). If they have problems with it, they are keeping it to themselves.

    It's hard not to worry, but it will all work out in the end. So just focus on making your little one for now! ;-)

    Baby dust!
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    Good luck to all the woman. It is a wonderful journey and like eeh876, I am almost 30 weeks pregnant. I am 43 years old and got pregnant right away no drugs no nothing just a great big LH Surge. Most people do not care how you get pregnant, the only people who have no clue that I did IUI is some of my parents friends. I have no need for their judgement and they are old biddies. I have great support from my parents who are over the moon that I am having their 8th grandchild. My mom will be up here with me for 2 weeks and then I am going to FL to be with them for 2 months.

    Good luck and us pregnant woman usually stalk the boards and give support where need be.
  • sgeesgee Posts: 16
    Hi everyone. Sounds like we are all in similar situations. I am 37 and blessed with a 5 year old girl from a relationship that didn't work out. I have always wanted another child and sibling for my daughter. I have talked about doing this for years. I told myself that if I don't meet the man of my dreams by the time I'm 37, I will get artificial insemination. So, here I am:-) I had my first IUI on Saturday and an anxiously awaiting this two week wait. It is already driving me crazy. I have no known fertility issues, but my doc put me on Femara on days 3-7 and Ovidrel shot on evening of day 12. IUI on morning of day 14. Fingers crossed! Anyone else take these medicines?
  • austingurlaustingurl Posts: 202
    Hi sgee,
    The 2WW is the worse:( I was on Femara for 4 months with no luck. Month 5, I kept the Femara and added Menopur shots days 8-10. It worked. I sadly lost the baby at week 8 though. Then on try 6, I jumped right back in with the same combination and it worked again. I am currently 8 weeks pregnant with twins. Good luck!!! I had no side effects from the meds and they worked like a charm. Once we found the combination that worked for me, it worked twice in a row (the second time a little too well)!!
  • SeattleSuzSeattleSuz Posts: 42
    Wow- so many similar stories. I just started this process as well. I turned 36 recently, and just had my first IUI on 8/19. So I'm in the TWW, testing on Sunday! Similar to others on this string, I would love to share this journey with a man, but it just hasn't worked out...so decided to do something about it on my own :) Started 'thinking,' and getting some testing done last fall, talking to fertility specialists etc...and decided that if I hadn't met love of my life before a big international trip in July, that I'd start in August. So here I am. I'd love to hear more from everyone else..
  • sgeesgee Posts: 16
    Austingurl- Congrats on your pregnancy with twins, how awesome! This wait is killing me and I can't stay off the Internet looking things up. The doc told me not to test before 2 weeks because I could get a false positive from the Ovidrel shot I took on day 12. I didn't think it stayed in your system for that long. I am so anxious, but I am not having any symptoms. I am trying not to stress about it, but it's not easy.
    Seattlesuz-Good luck to you and can't wait to hear some good news!
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    Sgee

    Do not stress about it. Relax. I went for acupuncture the day I was inseminated and had a glass of wine that night. I also tested way to early and didn't think it worked and now I am 10 weeks away from the LO arriving.

    When I did test I was in shock. I thought the two ww was horrible, but since I am 43 I thought the 2 WW for the amnio results was worse if that makes sense.

    Good luck and let us know what happens.

    I do not think I had any symptoms when I first got pregnant and I had minimal 1st trimester.
  • sgeesgee Posts: 16
    Anissa-Thanks so much! I'm trying to relax, heading to the beach for this holiday weekend. I will let you all know as soon as I find out. Congrats to you! Praying for me and everyone else that is waiting this long wait:-)
  • aagemaaagema Posts: 11
    sgee---Good luck! Looks like we had our IUI's on the same day!! Baby dust to you!

    SeattleSuz---any word yet??????
  • aagemaaagema Posts: 11
    Thanks everyone!!! 6 days away! Trying to stay really busy!!

    sgee--It looks like we had our IUI's on the same day!!! Baby dust to you!

    SeattleSuz--any word yet????
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    sgee How was the relaxing weekend? Did you survive? Just so you know, I think the 2 week wait after the amnio was worse than the 2ww wait to see if I was pregnant.

    Let us know what happens.
  • eeh876eeh876 Posts: 168
    SeattleSuz- Hope your test went well!

    sgee- Hope you are enjoying your holiday! I found it best to keep busy during the 2ww. Good luck!

    Baby dust to both of you!
  • SeattleSuzSeattleSuz Posts: 42
    After TWW, got a negative test and started my period today. On to Cycle 2, wish me luck! Anyone else getting good news?
  • juliazjuliaz Posts: 2
    Hi everyone!

    I'm new here too, and just getting started as well. I'm 39, and scheduled for my first IUI at the end of September.

    It's great to see all of the support on here. I'm sure that I'm going to need it, and lots of advice, as I go through this whole process!

    Good luck everyone!
  • sbarniesbarnie Posts: 4
    Hello everyone, thanks so much for this thread. I totally agree, this is really hard, but everyone on here is great and answers really fast. I had a chemical pregnancy on 4th IUI and waiting for results today to see if i can do a 5th and then i must decide on IVF.
    It is hard doing it on your own, but this support is huge.
    Sgee, the TTW is the hardest, i usually test the day before i go in for the pregnancy test, just so i can be prepared...that always seemed to help me.
    Good luck with everything.
  • Sasha95Sasha95 Posts: 32
    Hello everyone, I'm new here also and just starting this journey! I'm so excited about it, I was married for a few years and ended it when I realized that my husband never wanted children. I have always none that I wanted to be a Mom! I'm 35 now and just completed all my fertility work-up and I have low egg reserve.

    My plan will be letrozole ond days 3-7 and ovidrel. My IUI is scheduled for late september or the first week in October.

    Has anyone taken this combination of meds before and if so what was your experience and did it work for you?

    Baby dust to all!
  • AggieDeAggieDe Posts: 32
    Howdy all! I am also new to this journey and it is so fabulous to have this contact and thread with everyone. I will be 39 in October and will start have my 1st IUI mid September. I have already gotten my donor spermies and I am SO nervous and excited all in one!

    Has anyone else had low AMH/high FSH and been considered in "pre-ovarian failure?" My RE is not wanting to start with meds but is chosing to do just the LH surge for the 1st couple IUIs. Would love to know if anyone has had good luck without meds in this situation.

    I'm pulling all stops with acupuncture too! I figure if I'm doing it on my own....I'm doing it BIG!

    Good luck to all! Hugs my single mommies to be!
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    AggieDe I am 43 and got pregnant at 42 just using LH Surge. Did I have any known Fertility issues no clue. Tricks for the LH surge, watch your cervical mucus, as it changes the closer to your surge. I tested several times a day as I was told the first one in the AM is not necessarily the best time to test. I had back to back IUI's and got pregnant basically on my first try. My doc only used the LH Surge no meds no nothing. I will be delivering my LO in 9 weeks.

    As for acupuncture strong believer in it. I started the appts a couple of months before I got pregnant but then again I have been going for acupuncture for 10 years. Tell them that you are trying to get pregnant and they can get your body ready to go. I still go every 2 weeks while Pregnant and LO sometimes calms down and sometimes is wicked active. I also happened to have an acupuncture appt on the day I was inseminated so maybe that helped maybe not.

    Right now my acupuncturist is trying to flip my LO since LO is breach. I have a 11 cm fibroid and baby is running out of space to flip.

    Good luck and keep us informed.
  • sgeesgee Posts: 16
    aagema-I am planning on doing a test on Saturday, what about you? Thanks for the good luck, you too!
    AnissaS-We had a great time at the beach, didn't want to come back home, I will let you all know my results in a few days:-)
    eeh876-had a great holiday, hope you did as well. I am trying to keep busy:-)
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