I am 38 years old. I always knew I wanted kids. I didnt put my career ahead of having kids. I just kept holding out to meet the right man to have kids with. It was not easy, but I finally let go of that idea...only it may be too late for me. I got the results of my basal follicle count, FSH, Clomid Challenge, and AMH today. I went in with a long list of questions about my chances of still possibly conceiving the natural way, IUI, how many cycles with or without drugs, sperm banks, costs, local support groups (getting in touch with other single moms in the making), etc... NEVER, EVER did I expect to hear that even with in vitro, the chances of me having a child with my own eggs is less than 5%. I thought I had gotten over the absolute hardest part of this journey by letting go of the husband first idea and becoming comfortable with my decision financially. This has hit me like a ton of bricks. I am all for the use of an egg donor and adoption. I just never thought those would be my best options. It also took a while to be okay with the idea of not knowing the father. The idea of looking at that child and seeing me helped. Now, that's pretty much being taken away from me. Have some of you been told this but beat the odds anyway? My doctor said he would do whatever I want him to do...Several cycles of IUI, In Vitro with my own eggs (if any can be extracted). In so many words, he said anything is possible, but he was being real wtih me. My total BAFC was around 7. My FSH and Clomid Challenge were 17.3 and 6.3. My AMH was 0.2. He says the AMH pretty much confirms the high FSH. This is so very hard. Everyone assumed I would be fine. Me, being such the picture of health. I can blame no one. If I blame anyone, I can only blame myself. Still, I would love to go out and WHACK just about every ex-boyfriend I wasted precious time with. Someone out there...give me hope. Tell me your outlook was as bleak as mine but that you still had a successful pregnancy with your own eggs.
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