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Once more into the breach...

I spoke with my doctor today and they recommended we try again. They said everything looked right...the donor's count and motility was excellent, I had 3 good-size follicles (2 were 18's), I responded well to all the hormones, everything was in place the way it should be...it just didn't add up for whatever reason. But that's no reason why it won't work next time, I guess.

We need to wait until morning to make sure dh's commission check is as much as it has been lately (or more...more would be nice too). If it is, we'll have enough money to do this again...if not, I don't know what we'll do. My ex-husband owes me a thousand dollars, but if he knew that's why we needed the money there is no way in Hell he'd give it to us...he is THAT kind of person. (Incidentally, he is ALSO the same person who has had like 4 or 5 abortions with his gf in the past 3 years, and he calls to tell me about it every time!!!)

:( Here's hoping things go well this time. The way my luck is, though, dh's check will probably be too small tomorrow and we won't be able to do this at all...or there will be a run on donor #11116 and he'll be sold out...something.

I'm not feeling very positive right now. I'm in a very dark, sad place. Help me be more optimistic!!!

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    I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THE UNIVERSE IS AGAINST ME!!!!!


    I checked my bank balance this morning. Not only did dh not get "as much or more" commission as before, he got NONE!!! Instead of a $2000 paycheck like I was anticipating, he got only $750 today!!! Now we not only don't have enough money to try again this cycle, we don't even have enough money to pay our BILLS, because we cleaned out our savings account for the last try!!!!

    I have cried so much this week I didn't think I could cry any more, but I was wrong. :(
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    I'm sorry Omesaara,I can't really offer anything but my sympathy.
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    My parents can't help us because this past week, my brother bought a house and my sister filed for divorce, so all their extra funds are taken up with that right now.

    My ex owes me money but his number is disconnected.

    The only ones I know who have the funds to help are my wealthy in-laws, but they hate us AND they don't want us to have kids (they didn't even want us to get MARRIED because I am "just a teacher"...not "their breed" of people...too common. No, I am not kidding), so they would never help with this.

    I guess our last (and only) hope is to see if we are eligible for a line of credit with our bank...which is doubtful since we have really shitty credit...but we will see...
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    Adding insult to injury:

    Just got off the phone with the ex. His gf is pregnant again...probably having another abortion too.
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