First IUI - No success - Advice Needed

hopefulmeghopefulmeg Posts: 12
in Single Mothers by Choice
I thought the TWW was horrible! I never knew time could move so slowly. And then the dreaded AF came and I was more emotionally disappointed then I knew I could be. I wanted to seek guidance on how others handle the TWW and the emotional disappointment of AF or a BFN? I knew the chance of conceiving the first time around was low, but the impact was still more emotional then I thought it would be. I have a few close friends and my mom that are a great support system. However, they live 1200 miles away and none of them have been through this process. I felt even worse when I had to tell them. Any suggestions, opinions, guidance, etc. on how to handle the negative test results would be greatly appreciated!!

Comments

  • dolphin84041dolphin84041 Posts: 63
    Hopefulmeg,

    This whole process is hard, stressful, emotional, physical and mental. I did 8 iui's, i start IVF in a few weeks. I think what helped me the most are the women in CCB friends group on Facebook. Because we are all going thru the same thing and we know what eachother are feeling.
  • hopefulmeghopefulmeg Posts: 12
    Dolphin,

    I appreciate your response. I'm sorry to hear you've had so many IUI's with no success. I wish you the best of luck with IVF. I know the whole process will be worth it in the end, it's just learning how to get through it that I find difficult. Having a support system of women that are and have been through it would be helpful. How am I able to join the CCB friends group on FB? Am I able to do a search and friend request? Thank you so much!
  • newbie373newbie373 Posts: 17
    sorry it didn't work, it is really hard going through this, especially when you don't have a support network closeby. Are you planning another IUI? I'd say jumping back in is your best bet. I did 3 ICIs with no success and then did an IUI that worked. I think having support is key. I'd be happy to share with you anything I can to help for your next IUI.
  • hopefulmeghopefulmeg Posts: 12
    Thank you for your response Newbie. Yes, I'm having another IUI. I've started a round of Clomid this cycle. My next IUI should be mid next week. I'm very anxious. I actually travel up to where my family lives for my IUIs. That's where my doctors are located. After I conceive I'll eventually move up there towards the middle to end of the pregnancy to have the baby and stay there for awhile after the baby is born to have the help and support from my family and friends. This next IUI, I have my best friend and her daughter in town for a visit so that should make the first week go by somewhat not as slow.

    I will gladly accept any words of wisdom or opinions from your past experiences on how to not constantly stay focused on anxiety the whole TWW as well as handling the disappointment of no success.
  • newbie373newbie373 Posts: 17
    Hi, are you getting close to the IUI date? How are you feeling? Good decision to be around friends and family! I kept myself busy with friends and work during and after my IUI, and it def helped. I did 3 ICIs before trying IUI and during the ICIs I didn't tell any of my friends and felt pretty alone. With the IUI I decided I needed some support, so shared with 4 dear friends and it really helped. I also made a point to stay relaxed around that time and during the TWW. I took a long walk/hike everyday, tried to do yoga most mornings, cooked really nourishing food, and read a couple of light, fun books, watched a couple of lighthearted movies, and kept telling myself that everything will work the way it should...let me know how you're doing!
  • hopefulmeghopefulmeg Posts: 12
    Yes, my IUI is tomorrow morning. I'm feeling anxious but excited. I'm not sure if it's the Clomid or not but my line on my OPK was the darkest I've seen it yet. Even though they are 1200 miles away, I couldn't imagine going through all this without a support system. That's great that you finally reached out to friends. I have about 5 really close friends that know and are really excited for me.

    I am definitely going to try to stay relaxed more this time around. I already walk and do yoga everyday. I love to cook and read. So it sounds like I'm on the right track to keep my mind occupied and relaxed during the long wait. I appreciate you sharing your advice.

    You are absolutely right though, everything will work the way it should. That is a great reminder that I needed to hear.

    I'll keep you posted on how everything is going the next couple weeks and how this IUI turns out. Thank you!!
  • newbie373newbie373 Posts: 17
    I'm sending good thoughts your way, Meg!! If you want to chat during your TWW give me a skype call at ellie91773. I can give you my cell from there if you want :) My name is Ellie, btw. We can never have too much support!
  • hopefulmeghopefulmeg Posts: 12
    Hi Ellie! Thank you for the good thoughts. Unfortunately, it was another negative this past weekend. I didn't take it as badly as I did the first time. But I think that's because I didn't have much hope this time around. I'm not a negative thinker, so I'm really disappointed in myself for not thinking more positively. I did stay super busy this time around though during the TWW. I didn't even have a chance to login to CCB. Anyways, I'll be going for IUI number 3 this month. I start my Clomid today and will traveling up north for my IUI next week. I'm definitely going to keep the best attitude I can this time around. Third time is a charm, right? :) I appreciate the offer to reach out during my TWW. That is so nice. You're right, we can never have too much support!
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