Need lots of advice, moral support, questions!! Thank you in advance!

karin12345karin12345 Posts: 72
in Single Mothers by Choice
Ok, so no one said this was going to be easy and no one said this was going to be a short journey.

But, I am getting discouraged.

I have done 3 IUIs and my plan was to go to IVF (before my insurance runs out though insurance will only cover 1/2 of the treatments and also because of my age). I was cool and happy w that decision.

This week so far:
1) Guy I was dated who seemed kind of perfect abruptly ended things - ok that's a separate issue but I digress
2) I have an SIS to prepare for IVF (the timing is super critical for me - because of my job, I have to do the IVF during night float so there is a bit of a rush to get everything done)
3) I have a small uterine polyp
4) My REI will NOT do IVF until I have surgery to remove this (has anyone else had this? I really am skeptical that this little baby polyp is going to impact my chances that much and I am REALLY reluctant to have another surgery
5) So, my choices are a) do a freeze all cycle, get the embryos and then do FET later, THEN get the polyp out, then do the FET
6) Find a doctor real quick that can get this out (my REI says she can't fit me in to do the surgery)
7) Push everything back (until when I don't know)
8) Beg my doctor to do everything w that stupid polyp in there (she says she wants the cavity pristine)

As you all know freeze all + FET almost doubles the cost (but apparently some cycles need to get converted to freeze all anyway based on what happens w the embryos.

I am a doctor, and still this is all new to me!!! Unfortunately, my doctor does not spend a ton of time w me. Also, nothing is really a dialogue. For instance, she ALWAYS does assisted hatching, she insists on ICSI with donor sperm.

I really need some advice from those of you that have been through all of this, and know some much more about all of this than I do.

I would be forever grateful - thank you!!!

KC

Comments

  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    Karin don't stress. Questions for you and some answers. Not sure if this helps or not.

    1. When is your internship over?
    2. IUI's sometimes take 6 - 8 depending on the circumstances. Stress, work load etc. Have you tried any relaxation methods like acupuncture or massage to help increase the changes of getting pregnant.
    3. I had several fibroids that they did not want to take out that grew and they found more when they were delivering my LO they did not get in the way, so is it a polyp or a fibroid? What are the implications if they do not remove it.
    4. Why can you only do IVF during night float.
    5. If you were to push things back when would you try again. Is the only time to do this at night?
  • karin12345karin12345 Posts: 72
    Thanks, Anissa...

    Some answers from you. My residency is over in 12 months. We just graduated this year's class. Now, we are chiefs and exactly one more year. Obviously one option would be to freeze embryos and then do FET after I graduate, but I don't know if my biological clock will allow this! Plus, I don't want to keep pushing back having a chld.

    2. I did try acupuncture, but it is SOOO expensive, so I stopped (plus, tough to fit in with my work schedule). I just don't want to use up all my insurance $$ trying 6-8 IUI I don't think (plus the cost of the sperm). They also want me to switch to another donor if I continue with IUI, and I am reluctant to do this. I am doing massage.

    3. It's a polyp - not particularly big or small. To be honest, I don't know if my REI would even continue doing IUI with this polyp. I don't talk to her too too often.

    4. Because of my schedule, and being in the OR most mornings starting at 7:30 (and rounding on patients before 7:30), it makes it impossible for me to do so much morning monitoring (which only takes place between 7:00 and 8:30)

    5. Night float is the most obvious rotation to do it. But I have a couple other rotations in 2-3 months that I might be able to work with. One strategy might be to do the egg retrieval on night float and then the FET 2-3 months later on my next easy block.

    6. And, in the background in all of this, I'm worried about my job prospects. I would like to stay here in this hospital, and so would many of the other residents. Will they discriminate against me if I am pregnant? I guess this is not the place for me if that is true. Is this my own shame in this whole process.

    Help, and thank you!!! It feels like a difficult time!

    Thank you so much!
    KC
  • highlyfavoredhighlyfavored Posts: 61
    karin as far as the job thing goes I'm in kind of the same boat just maybe not as rocky as yours. Sounds like you have a lot of tough decisions to make. Just when I thought my situation was difficult yours sounds a bit more stressful. I recently changed jobs within the same gov't dept that I was currently working so the insurance stayed the same but it is shift work and during the 1st yr it is training and you are not guaranteed what shift you will be on. So that makes scheduling u/s and tests difficult. I considered going back to my previous job but that's less money but also less stress sort of. Don't really want to change jobs completely b/c I don't know what the insurance coverage for all of this would be.
    I know my situation is not exactly the same but it is just as stressful. As a matter of fact my IUI will need to be tomorrow no later than Sunday and they just told me 2 days ago at work that I will now be working on Sat and Sun. Good thing I have a great doctor that will perform the procedure when I get off and I was able to have it shipped to my dad's house while I'm at work. WHEW!!!
    Wishing everyone God's Blessings through all of this and hoping this is our month.
  • austingurl123austingurl123 Posts: 35
    Ultimately, it's your decision regarding what works for you. I will say it sounds like you don't have a great relationship with your doctor though. I know it's possible to get pregnant and not have a great relationship with the drs and nurses, but I have to say, I loved mine and it made all the difference to me. I had a rough road of 6 IUIs, 1 miscarriage, and preterm labor at 23 weeks with twins proceeded by a week of hospital bedrest. It was very emotional and trying. Loving my dr and his staff made it much easier. If you don't feel like your dr and staff are working with you and accomadating your schedule, I would look at changing drs.

    I don't have much knowledge of the effects of a polyp on pregnancy, none really, but if you are a doctor, then I would trust my own instincts and education. You know your body. However, if removing it increases your chances of a healthy pregnancy by even 1%, then I would remove it. As someone who has been through a traumatic pregnancy and 131 day NICU stay, anything you can do to increase your odds of a healthy pregnancy are worth it. If it doesn't make a difference in the pregnancy and chances of getting pregnant, then I would find a dr to work with you.
  • kncolekncole Posts: 30
    Hi Karin (I'm a KC too!) I've been MIA on here for a while because I just moved. So, I'm 42 -- 43 in a few weeks. Before I had IUI, I had a fibroid removed that was in the uterus (all the others are still there). IUI didn't work, so moved straight to IVF (due to age). IVF #1 produced one embryo which is now frozen. (This was my doc's plan.) Second cycle had ET falling the week of my move. (I was freaking out.) Ovulated too soon, so cycle was a waste (had 2 follies that were around 18 and 5 that were 11 in size). Now on BCP for a few weeks. Will start next cycle in July.
  • kncolekncole Posts: 30
    I forgot to mention that my doc decided the next ET will involve ICSI. I had a number of eggs retrieved last time, but just didn't fertilize. (Crazy that I can't even remember the number now.)
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