Venting...Frustration.....

I need to get this out of my system. I just completed my first IUI. I started my process with an RE last November. All through this process I have been fine. Went through every procedure, no problem. I have never been poked, proded, etc. so much in my whole life. I have been great physically and emotionally this whole time. After I got my bfn on the March 29th, Saturday, the 30th, that evening, a wave of emotions came out of nowhere. I mean for an 1 1/2 hr, I cried. Same thing Sunday. I am confused. Need words of encouragement. I am now not sure if I can handle another cycle. AF has not arrived and my body is all out wack. I am usually regular. Oh, and since I started the injectables, I've had no cm. WTF. So confused.

Comments

  • Deep breath. I think it is totally normal to have the feelings that you are feeling. I shed tears after my first IUI failed...and my second. My doctor told me that it takes 3-4 tries on average to get a BFP and anything sooner than that is a total blessing. He also said once you start taking the meds that trumps your normal cycle. Your new normal becomes how your body reacts to the meds. I started keeping a journal to get out my feelings so they didn't build up on me so much. It has helped. I know that this is totally worth it. Whenever that BFP comes it will take away all of those negative feelings and disappointments of the previous tries! You can do this!
  • I wish I could tell you it gets easier, but it doesn't. Just stay focused on WHY you are doing all this....and remember that the meds cause crazy emotional things to happen!! I know exactly what you are going through....I also write in journals to help get my feelings out. Few people can truly understand this process, but we all do here and we're here for you! Whe my 5th IUI was BFP I thought back over the 4 BFN's and they didnt seem so bad anymore and the time spent didnt seem so long anymore.
  • a_walton, hang in there. I planned on going to my re's office and walking out pregnant a year ago. I had no known issues since I had a normal pregnancy in the past. However, 8 years can do a lot (my daughter is 8 now). I have been trying for a year now and only had 2 IUI's due to many issues and cysts between cycles that holds me up for months at a time. I got pregnant the first try and ended in miscarriage. The 2nd IUI was unsuccessful. I tried Clomid and completely overstimulated. I have done 3 cycles of injections so far (some cycles cancelled after I did the injections). It is a roller coaster ride of emotions. I can't tell you how many times I've waited and counted down for more bad news. But I am waiting for the countdown to GOOD news and I know it will happen when the time is right and it's the right baby for me.

    Use your family and friends to get you through the tough times. When they don't understand what you're going through lean on your friends here who know all too well what you're going through. bl6866 and jaimec are right...you can do this and it will be so worth it in the end when you're holding that precious baby in your arms.

    I'll say a prayer for you. Keep your head up and look towards the good news.
  • Thank you all. I needed this. Here's wishing us all good news very soon. THANKS A BUNCH ; )
  • As Everyone says deep breaths. It happens when you least expect it. I know it did for me. Remember if you are on shots/meds those are causing your hormones to go even wackier then usually. Keep your chin up and it will happen. Trust me and then when you have your LO in your arms you will realize why it was worth it.
  • Thanks. You all are so strong and it makes me even stronger to know there are people going through the same thing I am going through and can understand me. Family and friends are helpful, but they really don't know. You all have brought me back and I am ready to do this. Thanks for the support. : )
  • Good to read everyone's posts. I am also way more emotional than I ever anticipated in this process. I need to be patient with myself and realize that while I am single and waited to make this decision alone but in the process realize just how much I really want this :-) So sad that I am now being recommended to use donor eggs.
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