Can't wait to try

vdaffronvdaffron Posts: 19
in Single Mothers by Choice
Hi everyone, I have debated whether to do this for more than two years now, but I've finally scheduled my first shipment and will begin trying next week! I am super excited to finally be over the hump of fear over what others will think of me and to be into the realm of hope and excitement for the future with my next child. I'm 36 and single mother of a beautiful 7 year old girl, and we are both very excited by the possibility of her having a sibling and me having another baby to love. I am definitely nervous because the donor I've chosen doesn't have any reported pregnancies. However I was told by Cryo that it was not at all something to be concerned about because all the samples must be of a certain sperm count. I have decided though that I probably will choose another donor if it doesn't take soon because I feel confident of my fertility based on personal and family history. It's so exciting. I wish today was next Tuesday when the shipment will come and I start testing for ovulation. I truly wish all of you the very best of luck and love and want to just express my true admiration and support for you all. I know how hard it is to make this decision, and you are all truly brave, progressive women of the future. (That's my humble opinion anyway!)

Comments

  • eeh876eeh876 Posts: 168
    Welcome to the ranks, vdaffron! I also used a donor that had no reported pregnancies at first. Normally that just means they are too new for those results to have started coming in. You've got the right idea; just switch if it doesn't take after two or three tries.

    I read this and your post on the faith thread. You sound like a positive person with a bright light within you. Keep up that positive attitude and your little girl will have a little brother or sister in no time! And what a lucky baby to be surrounded by so much love!

    Good luck, and keep us posted! :-)
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    Good luck. I had my 2nd IUI today. I am hopeful that it takes, based on the midwife, telling me it looked perfect for getting pregnant. I had an IUI yesterday and today and now the wait starts. My donor has had pregnancies, so we shall see. Good luck and I hope you have a sibling for your daughter. I hemmed and hawed for 2 years as well.
  • vdaffronvdaffron Posts: 19
    Thank you so much eeh876 and AnissaS! It's really great to be here and finally be opening up about something that's been so clandestine in my life up to this point. Actually, who am I kidding, I am still very guarded about it - but my obstetrician said that was probably wise. AnissaS I will be thinking of you and hoping for you. It means a lot to me to meet people on this path. I've felt very alone and confused about what I wanted to do for several years. And honestly still do - but I know I have to get/stay brave in order to get to the joy that is down the road. I will be honest though, I have had several doubtful thoughts today. But I have made the decision and need to get through this time. Strength to all.
  • vdaffronvdaffron Posts: 19
    One more thing, eeh876, I should have said thank you for those very kind words and for the resultant smile. My daughter was born with the bright light, and she teaches me. :-)
  • jaimecjaimec Posts: 329
    Welcome and congratulations on making this decision!! It can be a frustrating process but the women on this board make it bearable....that and the thought of a sweet little baby in my arms. Good luck and keep us posted!
  • austingurlaustingurl Posts: 202
    Good luck!! This board has been my saving grace during this process. I have very supportive friends and family, but it's great to post my thoughts to others who completely understand. As great as my family and friends are, they have not been on this journey and it's very difficult at times. You are definately not alone in the process.
  • jaimecjaimec Posts: 329
    so true austingurl! and it drives me nuts to have people say "I know how you feel" or "I understand what you're going through".....I actually said to one family member "oh really, I didn't realize you used this method to get pregnant??"...not my finest moment.
  • amy@laduska.comamy@laduska.com Posts: 21
    jaimec - that made me smile!

    vdaffron - Congratulations on your decision to go forward! My 3 1/2 year old son starting to tell everyone he was getting a baby sister prompted me to go ahead and try again and I'm glad that I did! I found-out that the group of docs that I used won't try past the age of 42. Since that group is the only one in the area who takes single women, I'm praying this works soon. As I posted in another thread, I've been waiting on AF so that I try my 2nd IUI for baby #2. I'm using the same donor that I used with my DS.
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    VDAFFROM I have had the same feelings for 2 years. I got pregnant by accident had a miscarriage and have been struggling for 2 years if I wanted to do this or not. I have told none of my family except my sister in law who gave me feedback on the donor. My mom has no clue. I am still struggling daily but I think that is because this 2 week wait is a long time and I have had to much time to think. I am hoping that it takes. The first time it didn't this time I am hopeful. The midwife that did the insemination said everything looked good now I will just wait and see. I think I can do an early pregnancy test this weekend. Insemination was Friday and Sat last week. I have had cramping on and off but not sure if it is period related or not. I usually get some cramping about a week before hand, but it is usually more severe. The only thing that I have noticed is I can smell things that no one can smell and smells before trigger migraines. I will wait and see, but am glad to have support from people here. I need to read the boards more frequently.

    Thanks everyone. I am keeping positive thoughts, the two weeks takes a long time.
  • vdaffronvdaffron Posts: 19
    Great to hear from more of you on this thread and to hear that we're not in this alone. It's so great to be able to relate to others during this emotionally trying and stressful time.

    Just wanted to give an update - tried for the first time on Friday but I wasn't yet ovulating... thought I would give it a 'test round.' However I was absolutely shocked at how small the vials are. I only ordered two and used the first one as a test. Also I had them arrive too early apparently. Even though I had been experiencing an early LH surge (or so I thought), it still has not happened yet this month, and I'm on day 14. The vials are only good until tomorrow, so I am going to go ahead and try again later today. I knew that getting pregnant on the first try was a long shot, so I'm not too disappointed yet. Also there's still a chance it could happen this month I guess, albeit a small one. Still hopeful! Next time I'll have to order more vials though.
  • eeh876eeh876 Posts: 168
    There can be a little bit of trial and error at first. ;-) Keep up that positive attitude!

    Good luck!
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    vdaffron Just an FYI... Pee on a stick more often then not. After you notice a change in your vaginal discharge TMI, I know, starting peeing on a stick a couple times a day. I found my surge the first time at 2 pm in the afternoon, I would have missed it if I hadnt done it that way. 2nd try, my cycle is usually 25 days, so on day 13 I was discouraged that I didn't have the surge by that point I was peeing on a stick 3 times a day. Never on the first pee of the day. On day 14 I tested at 8 am (2nd pee of the day) and it was a smiley face. Went and had an IUI that day and the next AM. Still waiting to see if it is a BFP, when I tested last Friday it was a BFN, I will probably test tomorrow and see. The only thing I have noticed, is hot flashes (mind you I am almost 43, only have had hot flashes when I was pregnant miscarried the first time) and when my iron is low. Also extremely hungry in the middle of the night. Still cramping like PMS cramps, but we shall wait and see. I think I was stressing out this month and that is why it was late. Good luck and keep positive thoughts.
  • vdaffronvdaffron Posts: 19
    Totally see what you mean about the 'trial and error.' The second time I inseminated (yesterday), I wasn't even half as stressed as I was the first time. And wouldn't you know it - this morning I detected my LH surge - one day after I used the second vial. I had to use it yesterday because they said it would only be good until Monday. Either way, I am excited to see that I finally had my LH surge, albeit later than usual. AnissaS, I think that like you mine was late due to sheer stress.

    On a side note, I have developed a peptic ulcer which began to flare up on Saturday. I think it's related to all this - the psychological stress. I am happy in the midst of all the pain however, knowing that I still have a chance of becoming pregnant.

    Question for the group: does anyone have any advice about how many vials to order and when to use them exactly when I try again next month?

    Positive thoughts to all.
  • vdaffronvdaffron Posts: 19
    More news! I just looked at my donor's profile and his pregnancy status has been updated to 'Yes'! So this is good news as I was worried that he hadn't had any pregnancies yet. Now the challenge is that he won't have more vials available until mid-March, so I have to wait to purchase. That's not very far away though in all reality, so I'm very encouraged!
  • rememberingmattierememberingmattie Posts: 8
    Just needing some advice when you guys receive the vials this maybe a goofy question, but have any of you inseminated at home and how?
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    vdaffron that is great news. Good luck.

    Remeberingmattie, I have no clue how to do it at home. I am glad that I am having a doctor do it. I saw what they put inside of you and they have to go through two holes in the cervix. The tube is wicked long. If you want me to email you the picture of what they use, I can. Let me know.


    Good luck all.
  • rememberingmattierememberingmattie Posts: 8
    Yes please email it to me my email is rememberingmattie@hotmail.com. and did you purchase this or did the doctor have it. I am so confused and new to this any advice would be so greatly appreciated i dont know how to purchase the vials nor do i know if my regular could perform it?
  • jaimecjaimec Posts: 329
    Rememberingmattie - my regular ob/gyn referred me to a reproductive endocrinologist. I also have no idea of how it's done at home. I do know that when I purchased the vials they had to get verification from my doctor....not sure how that works for a home insemination.
  • amy@laduska.comamy@laduska.com Posts: 21
    When you do ICI at home, you just go as far as you would if you were 'naturally' depositing the sperm; you don't go through the cervix. An IUI is usually done by a medical professional - midwife, nurse, RE, etc. - and is usually done in a medical setting - doctor's office or hospital. I've seen a few cases where a midwife or partner will do an IUI at home, but you have to use 'washed' sperm - hence the IUI quality that CC has available. Using unwashed sperm and doing an IUI can cause serious health problems.

    I did three at home ICI's and four in-office IUIs, the last with meds, when I had my DS. I skipped straight to IUI with meds this time.
  • vdaffronvdaffron Posts: 19
    Anissa, have you found out anything yet? I have been thinking about you and sending positive thoughts your way.
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    vdaffron no a 2nd BFN. No clue. If I do not have AF will test on first pee on Thursday. I am having some weird symptoms so you never know. Tmw is day 28 I think. So well see. Today I am exhausted and went to bed at 10 and got up at 5, which is usual but I could crawl back into bed. Also my nose is so sensitive, I left work the other day and could smell the floor polish they were polishing the floor with. They polish the floor every day when I leave but on Monday I could smell it. I am always hopeful but you never know. Will order more vials if need be.
  • BanditBandit Posts: 348
    vdaffron, thanks for asking though. Well see.
  • jaimecjaimec Posts: 329
    Anissa - I've had the sensitive nose this month too!! And the extra sleepiness. I've had insomnia for over 10 years and tried all kinds of medication. I've stopped meds completely since last November and generally sleep good about 2 nights a week. But I have slept like a log for the past week and a half from about 8pm - 4am!!
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