HELP!

TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
in LGBTQ+ Couples
So my partner and I were sapposed to have our 1st IUI done this weekend but I'm so conflicted between donors! how do I know I'm choosing the right one!? everyone I have my heart set on I end up finding something wrong! am I looking too much in too this? input any one...how did you choose the right donor? I'm anxious and would love to get this started:)

Comments

  • JRGodwinJRGodwin Posts: 34
    I looked at CMV status as well as ICI vials first. From there, I looked at medical history, eye color, hair color, height and race. I also looked at number of report pregnancies. I honestly...had no interest in the essays and such. I did look at baby photos but really people can lie about that so that was not that important to me either. I felt the same way about the essays...people could write what they thought you wanted to hear.
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    I also look at those same things in that exact same order!...my dotor prefers i use a CMV Neg donor and I need IUI vials...may I ask whats the difference? I'm looking for a more dark complected donor to match the characteristics of my partner and its hard i havent been able to stay set on 1 let alone find one thats CMV neg...have you done the process with success? maybe im just being overly paranoid i just want it to work out:)
  • 2moms2monkeys2moms2monkeys Posts: 99
    Wasn't sure which you were questioning the difference on CMV status or ICI vs IUI so here is info on both.

    Intracervical Insemination (ICI) specimens (standard unwashed)
    Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) specimens (pre-washed prior to freezing)

    Sperm Washing
    Semen is washed to separate the sperm from the accompanying seminal fluid prior to intrauterine insemination. The two types of washes performed at CCB are:

    Density Gradient Wash - sperm are separated from the accompanying seminal fluid on the basis of their motility through a density gradient media. The specimen is then washed again to remove residual media.
    Standard Wash - semen is rinsed in a salt buffered media and centrifuged to separate the sperm.

    ( basically they pull out all the dead sperm)

    What is CMV?
    Cytomegalovirus, or CMV as it is more commonly known, is a member of the herpes virus family which includes cold sores, chicken pox and infectious mononucleosis. In healthy adults, infection with one of these viruses is characterized by an acute phase followed by an immune response. These viruses are not completely eliminated from the body but are confined in low numbers within certain cells for the lifetime of the individual. This person is healthy, has no evidence of disease and will not ordinarily transmit the virus to another person. If there is a suppression of the immune system, the virus may reactivate, shed viral particles and cause disease

    My DP and I used the same critera as you did but after taking out height, race and iui/cmv negative donors we were left with 10-12 took out all those that were bald or had thinning hair since her family already has thin hair then read essays and took out the one or two that just rubbed us wrong which left us with 6-8. From there we did medical history (a year ago we had to pay for all medical history) that knocked out most of the rest and we were left with 3. We had a clear winner in our heads but printed everything out and had our family read the profiles. Everyone picked the same donor so that is how we ended up with ours. Our DS is now 7 months.
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    Ok So Tonight I'm going to do my narrowing down of donors...if it worked for you guys then I'm sure I'll be fine....I feel a bit more realaxed THANKS Girls:) I'll tell you how it goes:)
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    oH n @SQUIRT1117 I was asking about the IUI ICI- But wow thanks for all the INfo I guess I needed that too VERY helpful Thnx
  • 2moms2monkeys2moms2monkeys Posts: 99
    Anytime! Good luck and trust me it won't matter who you choose once you hold that precious little one in your arms all of the stress and anxiety of this process is gone and you wonder why you worried so much. Just make sure when you find the one you want to get extra vials just in case. We bought 6 one morning and decided that afternoon we should get 6 more by then he was sold out. Now we have this amazing kid (and a ton of half siblings) and all the families want more vials but he is retired so if the next 4 don't work we will have to find a different donor.
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    so its been such a long process going thruough all that info! but I narrowed it doen to 4! I really like 11255? any thoughts on that one? but Ill make it official by tomorrow:) I wanna have purchased them before new years because of the prices going up:) thanks for your help....now back to my search..
  • 2moms2monkeys2moms2monkeys Posts: 99
    I say go with your gut. If you really like 11255 go for it. He seems like a good catch. There is a lot of family medical history but what family doesn't have a lot of medical stuff these days! He is healthy and that is the main thing.
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    yes he does thats what holds me back.... but i dont know i also like him because Ive seen on here people have had luck with him twins on the 1st try...and hes CMV (neg),IUI and dark complected....but like i said im stuck between 4 he just has more good things and success posted on here..
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    ok so its between 11255,11695,11821 and 12261. Heared anything of those? Its nice to be able to ask someone my partner is so rushed about it when she sees one she likes shes like "ok that ones it lets do it" and I'm like hold on we needa look in too this..and Im always getting on her case to research and go on here but shes sooo rushed but I feel more obligated to look in to it since I;m going to be carrying this baby and I want the baby to be safe and in good health...as for her she wants this baby NOW..and dont get me wrong I do too but ever since I had that water sonogram I reaalized how real this all was and its a serious matter as much as I wish I were just pregnant already.
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    I wrote it all sloppy sorry if you dont understand it Im a bit queezy, flushed and at work.
    Those pills they give you after your water sonogram to avoid infection really do a number on me I feel nausea and just plain sick when I take them... the doc said I was perfectly fine but I dont know why I'm taking those pills did you hve them?
  • 2moms2monkeys2moms2monkeys Posts: 99
    My dp actually carried but she didn't have to take the pills. It's funny she was the rushed one in our relationship and I was the one that sat and read every little detail haha.

    I don't really know about any of the donors but I do know of one girl trying with 12261 right now. There are more than 5 reported pregnancies for him. He has the cleanest medical history of the 4 but all 4 of the donors themselves have a clean history so they are pretty even there.

    If you go to the search feature and put in the donor number it will pull up discussions on all the donors. There is at least one pregnant with 11255 right now and one trying with 11821 as well.

    For 11255 there are 2 siblings listed on the national donor registry so you know there are some live births already. I couldn't find any for the other 3 donors but you have to pay to register there so people may not have done it. He seems quite popular and he is the one you are favoring. I say go for it.
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    wow! your good ! for saying you hade not much info that was a good amount for me! and 12261 is one of my top 2! for some reason i got a good vibe off that one its just the pregnancies I havent see any info about him here so I was If-y but I just cant erase him! i also like that hes anonymous! so very refreshing to know i can follow my intuition and Ive had that donor in mind for a reason!
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    ooopppss HAD:)
  • 2moms2monkeys2moms2monkeys Posts: 99
    With the holidays I have a lot of time on my hands haha so I don't mind searching for info. If you are on facebook there is a group there called CCB Friends and I know there is one girl there who is going to try with 12261 in the next few weeks. May be someone to talk to? If you are interested I can give your screen name to the leader of the group and have her add you. It is a private group so you can only join by invite.

    I did a search on 12261 and one email said less than 5 pregnancies one said more than 5. I think it is actually less than 5 I am sorry. The most recent email was from Scott a few weeks back that said less than 5 but he was originally released in March '10 sold out in April '10 had more vials released in June '10 no births yet because it's only been 9 months. They would've had to get pregnant the week he was released to have a birth yet. :( Sorry for the bad info but he still sounds really good.
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    YES! I would love that..here I can give you my e_mail? TANYAL123@ymail.com that would be amazing:) Your sooo Nice! for searching for this info. it really helps me out so THANK YOU...
    Im addicted to this now:) you inspire me too speak up and try too help others on here..
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    my DP and I share a page:) so its the 2 of us n the pic. do you have a facebook? add us I would love to stay in contact through our journey! My wife laughs at me she thinks I'm crazy haha
  • 2moms2monkeys2moms2monkeys Posts: 99
    Of course. Happy to help! I love CCB for giving us our little guy and really enjoy hearing about everyone elses journeys! I will contact Lisa and give her your info. :)
  • 2moms2monkeys2moms2monkeys Posts: 99
    I do and I would love too! My pic is of our little man name is Laura McLane.
  • 2moms2monkeys2moms2monkeys Posts: 99
    Yes! I sent you a request. The pic is of our son and my name is Laura McLane. It's ok my wife thinks I am too. I keep in touch with all the moms of our donor and she won't. It makes her uncomfortable to think about all the other kids out there with the same father I like it I like knowing the history of the kids and with our donor all the kids looks a lot alike.
  • TanyaBTanyaB Posts: 79
    OMGEEEEEE your baby is gorgeous!I am sooo happy for you guys! and he seems like a very happy baby also!......I hope you guys have the best christmas ever with lots of m emories and good family times THANK U
  • 2moms2monkeys2moms2monkeys Posts: 99
    Aww thank you! He is always happy even when he is sick. We are truely blessed. Hope you have a wonderful Christmas as well. Let me know who you decide to go with I am so excited for you two!!
Sign In or Register to comment.