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Scared,nervous, excited, giving up on Mr. Right.

one1centone1cent Posts: 4
in Single Mothers by Choice
Hi 1cent! I definitely hear you - as I think a lot of the single moms (to-be) on here will. Here's another way to look at it... Who is to say that you can't still have a child with the man of yoru dreams, etc? Do you only want one kid? If you are ready, then go ahead with the donor baby. You may still meet the one - he may just be taking his time!

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    one1centone1cent Posts: 4
    Hi, I am 39 and there is no doubt that I want to be a mom, and have told myself for a long time that I wanted to be pregnant before 40, man or no man. I haven't been in a serious relationship for a couple years, and the last year was going to school full time and working full time. I am now finished up with school, working full time as a RN and finally feel like I can start my life and get it on tract. I have been dating a bit the last few months as I have finally had a chance to, and I don't know maybe I was hoping for some miracle that I would meet the one right away and we would ride off in the sunset and have babies right away. Hasn't happened :) There is one guy that I really like, and there may be potential, but we are moving slowly through the getting to know each other phases... I had told myself after the first of the year that I was going to stop dating (trying to find the one) and start the insemination process. There is part of me that is excited, and knows this is the right way to go, and then there is part of me that still really hopes to have a child with the man of my dreams, and raise it with him, and is wondering if maybe I should just wait a couple more months, maybe he will come along, and maybe by giving up and going about getting pregnant myself I will miss him... Does anyone else have these doubts, questions, worries... ?
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    babylove02babylove02 Posts: 89
    Hi one1cent,
    I think you should go a head and look for a donor of your choice. I'm 38 and have a 4 months old daughter. I couldnt wait for mr right any more. I use a donor my daughter is the best thing ever happen to me.I wish I had done it earlier.I'm even thinking about having another child.good luck
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    LilyM138LilyM138 Posts: 32
    Hi one1cent,

    I post on another board with single women trying to conceive and for those of us who are late thirties, or early forties, the one thing we all agree on is - why didn't we stop waiting and start trying earlier?

    I, too, still want to meet Mr Right - I'm sure most of us here do - but we've got the rest of our lives to do that ... and what if he keeps taking his sweet time and doesn't show up 'til we're 45????

    Maybe you could start the process - I don't know if you've had your initial blood tests and hsg etc. done - but you could still continue to date at the same time, while you're doing all of that? That way neither one of your dreams is going on hold.

    Good luck.
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    lecee2010lecee2010 Posts: 3
    Hi 1Cent,

    I know exactly what you mean. I too am 39, have been waiting and have realized that I might be waiting for nothing or atleast well past my biological clock.. So I am going forward. I hope that I will meet someone who will accept my child and if we are able to have more that would be cool with me too. I just know that we have no idea what the future holds, but biology doesn't wait for any woman. I wish you luck and baby dust on all of us!
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    GiftsofJoyGiftsofJoy Posts: 35
    Me too ! I reflect on how my kids kids are having kids and I haven't begun. My former students are having kids and they aren't even 18 yet ! Scary !
    I'm ready now ! Matter of factly, I'm trying at the beginning of the year ! Here's to 2011 !
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    nbound72nbound72 Posts: 153
    Hi everyone - I haven't posted in a while but after reading this thread I wanted to post. I just turned 38 and I am 16 weeks pregnant with a donor. It took a long time for me to accept that I'm a single mom and I am still very hopeful that I will meet a wonderful man but the craziness I felt to hurry up and meet Mr. Right has ended and I am the happiest I think I've ever been. Everyone in my life is so thrilled for me and it's the greatest decision I have made. Only you know when you are mentally ready. The ultimate goal is to become a mom and I can't wait. Good luck with the process.
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