first timer/Newbie

Hi there I am doing this alone and I am a bit scared and excited but thought I might ask all of you some questions that I am unsure about.
I am 35 years old.
I had my FSH levels come in at 7.8, had my estrodial levels come back normal. I did my HSG today and that was normal.
Would you say try insemination with the clomid therapy or without the first time? Advice?
Looking for any insight anyone has.
Thank you and for all of you single mom's that have done it and have a little one. It's possible to do this alone ri
ght?

Comments

  • Welcome hhostetter!

    Have you selected an RE yet? I think most go unmedicated during their first IUI, but that would be something you could discuss with your RE because she will have a better understanding of what would be best for you.

    I have a 5 year old son from a previous marriage and I have been raising him on my own since he was 2. Although it is hard, it is possible and truly a blessing. I love being a mother and hope to be blessed with another little one soon - I had my first IUI today!

    I wish you the best of luck on the start of your journey!!!
  • Wow thank you for such a quick response tjmoors! I am sending good vibes your way. I do have an RE. I assume that means Reproductive Endocronologist? If not then I have no idea what an RE is and that is how much of a newbie I am.

    Thanks for the input. I can handle the hard piece just needed to hear it's possible and you must be able to survive it because you are trying for number 2. Is this one also on your own?

    I am happy for you and thank you so much.
    I think I will try the IUI first without and see what happens.
    Good input!
  • No problem, hhostetter =) You will find that others on here are very supportive! And yes, an RE stands for Reproductive Endocronologist. Don't worry - when I first started my journey, I had no idea what all these acronyms stood for ;)

    I am not an expert, but that is great that all your tests came back normal. Please keep me updated on how everything goes for you, and I will be praying for you from now until you start :)

    Oh, and I have chosen to do my IUI as a single mother. Yes, I have survived and I know you will do just fine :) Motherhood is a blessing!

    Take care.
  • Wow hi everyone! Well I am a super newbie to this site, but not a newbie to the special world of single motherhood :) I have a 3yr old daughter. I have been thinking about my daughter having a sibling and at first my mothers suggestion which lead me here seemed almost impossible for me to achieve. I actually laughed at her..wow silly me. Now I see more and more that this really can be an option for my little family to grow for my parents to get the second granchild I knew they didn't really give up on, for my brother to have a nephew (yea good luck w/that! Haha) and for my daughter to have a sibling. Well with no male in sight and 26 approaching life cannot wait forever can it and I don't want to settle or teach my daughter to settle for anything. Thanks for providing an outlet for my rambling ever emotion self to vent. Somehow I think I had locked away that yearning for a 2nd child and now its gnawing at me...again sorry for the long post/rant...good luck to everyone in our pursuit of motherhood!
  • Welcome keaks03 :)

    I am in a similar situation as you: 26 years old with a 5 year old son. I am doing this as a single mother looking to have another baby - and a sibling for my son. My mother has been supportive since day one, which has been over one year since I've thought of going the "IUI route". I've always wanted to have kids who are close in age and my son will be 6 in 3 months, so I am running out of time.

    I actually had my first IUI on Monday (3/15), but I'm not too thrilled about it because I may have gotten my period 4 days after the IUI due to a Luteal Phase Defect. I've never even heard or thought of this, but you learn a lot about this process from researching online and listening to others on here.

    I wish you the best of luck on the start of your journey!
  • Hi Tara,

    Did you finally move to Hawaii? IUI done by a RE there?..

    Dont stress out about the age difference thing, my daughter's older, she's 7 so by the time I get my IUI and give birth she'll be 8. I know it feels like our time is running out quick specially when we already have other children that are growing so rapidly in age. Wide age difference, but its better late than never :)
  • Hey Pamela,

    Yes, I have been in Hawaii since March 1st. I had my first appointment on March 8th and my first IUI was on March 15th. So, things have been going by quickly for me :) That's a good thing, seeing as how I will only be here until June.

    The TWW has been tough, and it's only been 6 days for me! I've been having some bleeding since Friday, so I have an appointment tomorrow morning with my RE. I PRAY and HOPE everything turns out okay and that this is implantation bleeding and not my period...

    You are absolutely right though: better late than never.

    Take care :)
  • Thanks TJMOORS! Yea I'm pretty much in the research phase still hoping to be in development some time in the fall or winter so I can have a springy summer baby :) so I'm guessing I'll need to start w/ a preconception visit but was wondering could I go through this process with an ob/gyn or do I need to start straight with the specialist? Not renewing my depo shot in may and crossing my fingers I don't need a whole yr to return to normal...geez all the thought we put into not hving babies sometimes and then have to deal with the consequences when we want one dam bc :/ crossing fingers though!!!
  • Yeah that seems pretty quick. Things have speeded up for you. Well hope everything goes well for you and you get a BFP in this TWW. Good luck!
  • I'm in the very very early stages of this whole process myself. I'm so glad that they have this thread. I'm a bit older than Tara, I'm 38. I have decided that with no man in sight and not wanting to go through my first pregnancy after 40 I have to plan this year and get everything in order. Then I'll be ready to begin the process and hopefully can be pregnant shortly after turning 39. Prayers for all of you mommies. Since most of you are talking about IUI I have to ask, is there a reason for IUI over ICI or was it just personal preference?
  • Hi littlebit31! Welcome to the group I'm a super newbie to the group and I was wondering about ici vs. Iui as well. I was kinda looking at going ici (I found something called the conception kit, which includes something called a conception cap..intresting little thing) bc I wanted to do it at home :/ that makes me even more nervous what if I do it wrong yikes! but iui for some ppl seems to have a better shot at a bfp just bc of different conditions inside the body, cervix uterus shapes ph balance of the va-ja-jay messin with the boys. But every woman is different just keep researching learn your body and trust your insticts

    My mom and I giggle about my pursuit of babydom via the solo baby dance once I get to the stage everyone else is at I hope those boys can swim lol!!!

    Good luck everyone
  • Hi littlebit31!

    I have read about a lot of success stories with women your age and older. I think it's empowering to meet other women like you who have chosen to have a child on their own instead of waiting for a man. I have been ready to have another baby since my divorce in 2006 and being single is not going to stop me. Sadly, my first IUI did not go as expected: I had my first IUI on March 15th and was supposed to take a pregnancy test on March 29th when OUT OF NOWHERE, my period came 4 days after my IUI!!! It has never come this early and I pray that it won't happen again, so I am preparing for IUI #2. I feel a sense of urgency because I will only be in Hawaii 'til June at the latest, so I really need that BFP.

    Anyway from what I understand, an ICI is typically done at home and has a lower success rate than an IUI - the sperm gets closer to the egg in an IUI procedure and the success rates are higher than doing it at home.
  • Hi all from Australia! well I to am 38 and over trying to find the right man to start a family and I am looking at going it alone. Does anyone know how long this process roughly takes? I have to learn all these new letters but was does BFP stand for? Thanks and good luck.
  • Hello jo101,

    Welcome! Nice to see another single mother by choice on here. I think the process varies greatly for each person, but here's how it went for me:

    March 8th: First appointment - had ultrasound done.

    March 12th-13th: Tested at home with an OPK (ovulation predictor kit) - got a surge on the 13th

    March 15th: had another ultrasound done and then the IUI procedure.

    I was supposed to take a pregnancy test on the 29th, but unfortunately my period came four days after I did my first IUI :( Hopefully, IUI #2 will be in a couple of weeks.

    Have you found a Reproductive Endocrinologist yet? BFP stands for Big Fat Positive, TTC is Trying To Conceive, and TWW is the dreaded Two Week Wait after an IUI. Hope this helps and keep in touch!
  • Hi ladies!
    I too am new to all of this! I am almost 31 (still young but I am sure you can all hear my clock ticking!!!) I stopped taking my BC pill a week ago and started tracking my temperature each morning. I have my first doctor appointment in a week. I didn't go to RE but instead with my OB/GYN. Is that a wrong decision on my part? Should I look into an RE or wait to see what my OB says?

    Thanks tjmoors for the help with all of those letters!!! It took me a bit to figure out some of them and TCC was giving me a hard time! :)

    Does anyone have any words of advice to a first timer like me for questions I should ask my doctor?

    Thanks!!!
    Beca
  • Hi,
    I am new to this too. I just had my first appointment though, so my list of questions is sitting beside my computer. I did not start with an RE but with an A.R.N.P. who specializes in OB/GYN and fertility. This is what I asked:

    How did you come into this line of work? What is your training, experience, and qualifications?

    How do you feel about working with a single mother by choice?

    What tests do you recommend prior to insemination given my age (33) and my medical history?

    How will you monitor my treatment? How many attempts before recommending a different approach?

    How do you recommend that I detect ovulation? When should I being?

    Explain the steps taken prior to and during an I.U.I procedure?

    Are appointments available on weekends or holidays?

    What sperm banks do you work with and recommend? Why?

    Should I be tested for CMV?

    What are the costs involved?

    The first appointment was full of information that I am still digesting. I hope this helps and that your appointment goes well!

    Lara
  • Wow Lara!
    Those are great questions! I never thought of asking about their opinion of working with a single mother. One of my questions I do have is what OPK do you recommend if any (digital or not)?

    What does ARNP stand for? Is it some sort of a nurse practitioner?

    I have been playing phone tag with someone who works at my insurance company and fertility treatments aren't covered. I haven't called her back yet, but if I am not experiencing fertility issues, would IUI be considered a fertility treatment?

    Thanks again Lara! If you don't mind me asking, when will you start your IUI?

    Beca
  • beedub514,

    Most women recommend using the Clear Blue Easy digital OPK that has the smiley face instead of the ones that use lines. I have used both and have to say that it can be difficult to read the lines, so it's much easier using the digital smiley face one :)

    Good luck!
  • Hi,

    I am glad that the questions were helpful. A.R.N.P. stands for Advanced Registered Nurse Practitioner. Mine works with a larger fertility clinic in Seattle but is based in my hometown about an hour and a half away. The question about single motherhood turned out to be a non-issue. I wanted to be sure that I was working with someone who is open-minded though.

    All insurance plans are different. My plan covers diagnostic testing. It does not cover any of the visits related to insemination.

    I would also recommend a visit to your regular doctor prior to starting this process. About a year ago I had my bloodwork done to check my vaccinations, iron levels, thyroid, etc. Turns out that I needed to update several vaccinations from childhood. The Hepatitis series took about six months to complete. I also started prenatal vitamins a couple of months ago.

    I will have my bloodwork and an ultrasound completed in the month of April. If all goes well, my first I.U.I. will be in May. I am hoping to get pregnant so that I deliver in the late winter or spring as I am a teacher and would like my delivery to be prior to the summer if possible. I am financially prepared to go through 5 cycles. Then I would wait until the following spring to begin again.

    I haven't started detecting ovulation yet. That is on the to-do list for April. I plan on using the Clear Blue Easy Digital OPK with the smiley face as I have heard it is easy to read.

    Let us know how your appointment goes!

    Lara
  • Lara and tjmoors,
    I too plan on using the digital OPK from CBE. I have a friend who likes the lines but many people here say they like the digital. I am all about easy to read!

    Lara - I'm a teacher too! I am no longer in the classroom but I am a reading coach for K-3 teachers. My plan is to get pregnant in June or July so that I am able to have my baby later in the year so that I am back at work for a short time before having 2 months off for summer.
    Are you temping now? I had some bloodwork done a few months ago to test thyroid and I know my vaccinations are up-to-date. I will have to go through my results to see if I had iron levels and anything else pertinent tested.

    I currently have enough money for 5 vials possibly 6 depending on what my insurance will cover in terms of visits and testing. Should I plan to do 2 vials per ovulation to increase my chances or stick to 1?

    One week from tomorrow and I see my OB/GYN! It's all I think about really!!!

    Thanks again!! Keep me posted on your journey!
    Beca
  • Good choice, beedub514! When I was first testing at home in anticipation of my first IUI, I could not find the CBE smiley face ones around so I reluctantly used the CBE with the 2 lines. I was so nervous because it was so hard to tell if the line was darker, or the same...ugh!

    Have you discussed with your OB/GYN or RE whether or not they'd use 2 vials? Originally my RE said she wanted to do back-to-back IUI's for my first time but when I went in for my first IUI, she said it would not be worth it to do a second IUI the next day because it would be too late.

    Best of luck :)
  • Hi,

    We have more than just being a teacher in common. I am also the literacy coach in my building one day a week.

    I am not charting my temperature. The person who I am working with feels that an ovulation monitoring detector will suffice. She also said that research shows that one insemination attempt is just as likely to result in a pregnancy than two. I know that there are differing opinions on this though on this discussion board and elsewhere.

    I am having lots of fun sharing my donor profiles with close friends and family. We are listing the pros and cons of each donor (though everyone knows I get to have the final say). So far we've consistently picked the same top two. I think people are more interested in the process of donor insemination than they are with who I actually pick. It is nice to feel supported.

    Sounds like you are ready for your appointment. I hope that it goes well!

    Lara
  • Hi Lara :)

    I did buy a BBT thermometer but never really consistently used it. I used the Clear Blue Easy OPK with the lines (had no choice) for my first IUI and got a surge on day 2 of testing. My RE said OPK's will not be accurate enough for me because I am not producing enough good eggs, so I will be monitored by ultrasound. I have another appointment tomorrow to check the growth of my follicle and determine when IUI #2 will be done - I can't wait!

    I think it is so great that your friends and family are being so supportive and even looking through the donor information with you! The only people I've told are my mom and my sister (recently). My mom has been supportive since the beginning and I think my sister was just in shock when I told her.

    But I know how important it is to have a good support system during this journey. I wish you lots of luck!

    Tara
  • tjmoors - I plan on asking my OB/GYN about 1 or 2 vials. I am not sure if my insurance covers an IUI - would that be considered a fertility treatment? I have to talk to the doc and see how much an uncovered appt would cost. I also plan on asking if I am doing the ICI (at home) should I do 2 or 1.

    This is all VERY exciting! I see babies everywhere! I notice pregnant people now. It's like when you buy a new car and you see it everywhere you go when you never saw before! :)

    Lara - how do you coach only 1 day a week! :P Mine is full time and I have to make myself take it easy!

    Thanks ladies for EVERYTHING!!! I will post again after I see my doc next week.
    Beca
  • Hello All, I am brand new to all of this. I just decided in the past few months, after years of bad relationships and feeling the desperation of wanting to be a mother, to just go it alone. Of course with my wonderfully supportive family around me I won't really be alone. Tired of waiting for a man to be ready and dictating to me how to live. I found Cali Cryobank on a google search, and since I started reading it I feel so releived/happy/inspired/and resolved in my decision.
    I'm 30 years old...31 in about a month, and past ready to have a baby. I have helped raise my ex-boyfriends daughter for the past year and it solidified my resolve to have my own baby. (ex-bf's daughter is nearly 3.)He and I are on very good terms and she will always be in my life, and I'm thankful for that...but it's just time for me to have what I've dreamed of.
    This forum has been very helpful, reading what people have gone through/ going through and the support they're getting through the site is incredible. I will be happy to be involved in this community.
    Just getting started in all of this so I haven't started documenting everything just yet or tracking my temperature. I'll be going to the obgyn soon for a check up and will broach the subject then with her. Though I might get an OPK just to see if I am ovulating every month for the time being.
    Cheers everyone...baby dust to all!
    -Sheila
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