Do fertility docs ask ?'s about your income?

2beamom

Hi, I was wondering if any of you have had your drs ask you your income. I am worried that mine will. I obviously have enough money to raise a child or I wouldn't be doing this. But I am definetely not rich and don't have the level of money that all of those statistics and studies seem to think you need? Where do these studies have your child going to school Harvard preschool, wearing gucci shoes and Ralph Lauren clothes? The amount they seem to think you need in inrease in living costs is ridiculaous for the average person/ Anyway, have any of your doctors required you to dislcose your income level? Is this right for them to even do so when married couples don't have to get "preappproval" before deciding to get pregnant/become parents? thanks Nicole

ryanhl

My doctor didn't ask me about my income. I'm a teacher, so I'm definately not rolling in the dough. :) I was the one that brought up the question about cost of procedures & such because I'm on a budget. He told me that I either wanted a child or not that money shouldn't matter. (I was a little shocked that he made that statement). Anway, Nicole... I wish you the best of luck. :)

MamaLaura

Nicole - I don't have a fertility doctor, but when I spoke to my gynecologist about signing the form to get me signed up with CCB, she did ask about it. Not in a formal way, but more in a personal way. We have a good, friendly, personal relationship. I consider her a good family friend. And her only question was about whether or not I can handle the expense of a 3rd child (I already have 2). She knows I'm doing fine financially, but threw out the question with a few others - still more of a friendly discussion than anything else.

I know that a lot of the current controversy surrounding Nadya Suleman (sp?) - the mother who just gave birth to octuplets in California, after having 6 children at home already - is her financial state. Obviously in her extreme case, it's more to think about, but that could effect other fertility doctors in the coming months.

I do think that everything I've read regarding the cost of raising a child is pretty far fetched. My children aren't grown or anything, but so far it's really not been bad at all. The first child is the most expensive, and subsequent children are less so when you save things like cribs, unisex clothing, sippy cups, toys, etc. Eventually there will be other costs of course - cars, school supplies, prom dresses, etc.

I think those estimates include things like cars and college tuition. My parents bought me my first car, but I have friends who bought their own cars, or paid for half. I have a lot of friends who went to college purely on scholarships, loans, and grants. Teens can work and help pay for the "fun" stuff. There are lots of preschool programs on a sliding scale or even free.

I'm rambling now, but my point is that I think people overestimate the cost because they include everything you could possibly buy your child and it's all brand new and name brand. There are most certainly ways to save, and the average person (even below average - income wise) can manage it if they want to.

2beamom

thanks for the replies! :)

msdizzydolores

Thanks MamaLaura,
I am new to the forum and I'm in the process of starting this journey. I make a good salary and finances are my primary concern at the moment.
I've heard it said over and over...if you keep concentrating solely on finances you will never go through the process and become a parent...and that's true...many single women have raised 4-5 kids on salaries less than $35,000...and made it work...why can't I do the same?

I will be seeing my OB tomorrow to get my annual pap and have her run test. I'm hoping things will be ok so I can start trying in Nov-Jan.

Dolores

jam1120

This is my second time around with the process. I am blessed to have a wonderful 2 year old and hopeful for another. It has been a struggle to decide for another, I didn't want to take away from my first. But then I realized that family was more important than anything I needed to pay or buy for him. My salary is nothing great but I make it work and sometimes have to be conservative but it's so worth it.

My fert. doc never formally asked me, but made sure I was aware of the cost associated with treatment. My insurance does not pay a dime until I have tried 12 times. It has gotten expensive since this will be my 4th try this time and the drugs are expensive.

But you can manage on any salary to raise a child. Good luck.

vegaschic

well, I'm a single mom and it is a huge strain on my income. My child costs about 1K a month including daycare, food, diapers, clothes, etc.

I didn't think it would be so much, either. But when you are providing breakfast, lunch and dinner every single day to this little person, that will cost 15$ a day, maybe including milk and juices too. but 15$ a day adds up to over 400$ a month and then 400$ a month (or more for full time, but i'm lucky to only have to put my son in daycare part time and part time still costs me 400$ a month) for daycare, so thats 800 but you also have diapers, clothes, toys, etc... so, i would say it is a cost of 1K min per month to raise a child and that is NOT buying designer clothes and accessories.

That 1K doesn't even take into account big ticket items you may need and bottles and sippy cups and all that stuff too.

Hope that helps give you a realistic idea of how much a child costs.

I'm going for a 2nd child, but I'm not even sure how I'll do it financially! But I'm going for it anyway. =) But since I'm going for my second child, at least I have all the big ticket items and even all the bottles and sippy cups.. and i'm almost actually hoping for another boy, so I can just use all hand-me-down clothes!!!!! Plus boys just seem soooo much cheaper! lol