New to this process...

nichtrinnichtrin Posts: 29
in LGBTQ+ Couples
So my partner and I have been together for 8 years and have been pregnant once but lost our son when he was 5 months old. We are looking to start new and a different way: frozen sperm. I was seeing if anyone could give us some helpful hints on what to look for and maybe some good donors. Right now we have donor 12419 and 12404. Any info would be great.. Thanks.

Comments

  • mi_campanillami_campanilla Posts: 16
    I am so sorry for your loss; it must be difficult to start again. You may find that people have a different view of what is important to them - for some people it is the donor's "open" status, for others it is the donor's medical history and for others it is how the donor looks or maybe a combination of the above. Ultimately it is a very personal decision but you will find that lots of people will support you. Have you tried using the search function to see if there are any threads about those donors already? I thought they were very helpful. I learned that a donor we had been interested in only produced boys and we wanted more of a 50/50 shot at either sex. I'm not familiar with either of those donors but wanted to wish you luck and lots of baby dust... And to say "welcome".
  • nichtrinnichtrin Posts: 29
    How do you know how many pregnancies have been by a specific donor or that your donor only produced boys so far?? We are mostly matching my partners characteristics to a donor and factoring in the medical history. Besides that we do not know what to do from there. I meet with my doctor on the 23rd to figure out the process.
    Also is there a donor that has better counts or more pregnancy success than others or are they all the same?
    Thanks for the info...
  • jalajala Posts: 142
    Most donors have a pretty even count of boys and girls some have higher but really impossible to know for sure what you are going to get unless your RE does gender selection. Our donor has produced 17 boys and 10 girls that we know of.

    They won't tell you how many pregnancies exactly just 0, less than 5 or more than 5. They will no longer tell you how many births each donor has or genders either.

    Each donor is capable of getting someone pregnant some just seem to work better than others for different people. If you do a search for each donor if someone has used them they may no sperm counts etc but honestly I don't think it matters. I have heard of donors with 80-90 million and no pregnancy ours was more like 25 and we got pregnant second try. Others get pregnant on less than 5 million. You have to remember it only takes one. Good luck.
  • nichtrinnichtrin Posts: 29
    Jala- What is an RE?? And to get pregnant on the 2nd try seems really good... were you taking hormones, recording your temperature, testing your LH surge???
    I am really regular and have been on average 27 to 28 days. I just started recording my temperature to be able to compare for next month when we try. Im pretty sure my doctor will answer alot of my questions, I just dont know if I should suggest more things like hormones or an ultrasound before insemination or to inseminate twice in one cycle. I am just really nervous and want to get the best value for my dollar amd to get PREGNANT and have our family back!!!
  • jalajala Posts: 142
    Reproductive Endochronologist - doctor who specializes in fertility.

    No hormones partner was totally unmedicated, our RE told us not to bother temping so we stopped, all she had us do was get the clearblue easy digital OPK tests and start testing every morning at 9am on cycle day 10. As soon as we got the smiley we called her and were inseminated 23-24 hours later.

    There are a lot of ladies here who started with meds and some who did back to back IUI's. Our RE would not do medicated cycles since there were no fertility issues unless we were not pregnant after 3 tries. She also wouldn't do back to back she has been doing it a long time and feels strongly that one well timed IUI is all you need. It worked for us so I can't argue but I know there are a lot of ladies who got pregnant after charting temps, using meds and/or doing back to back so everyone here will tell you something different. This is just what we did. :)

    I am so sorry for your loss and I pray this process goes smoothly for you. Baby dust.
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