Can open donors be 'upgraded' to ID-release donors?

JasmineBusaJasmineBusa Posts: 13
in Ask California Cryobank

Since originally purchasing sperm from you 2 years ago, I notice you now have an ID-release programme. This is something I desperately would have wanted had it been available when I was purchasing.

I am planning to have another child but of course want to use the same donor as my current son so that he has a full sibling.

Since having a baby, we, as many others, have regrettably read some of the terrible experiences that donor offspring have had with the "facilitated contacts" that CCB supposedly offers, and this breaks my heart as it is NOT what we have signed up for.

My question is, is there any way for CCB to reach out to the donor and ask if he would be willing to become an ID-release donor? The donor has since retired.

Thank you.

Comments

  • cryo-admincryo-admin Posts: 4,542

    @JasmineBusa We're glad to hear that you have a little one and planning for a sibling! When the time comes for your child to request contact, we will do everything we can to help, regardless of the donor’s status (anonymous, open, or ID Disclosure). We work very hard to facilitate contact whenever possible and have many wonderful outcomes.

    You can understand how the prospect of meeting an offspring 18+ years later can be a bit intimidating with considerations about your own family, career, etc. We work closely with the donors who are hesitant about contact to address those concerns. Once we help them understand they can maintain their privacy and that the offspring isn’t seeking money, or a father figure, or a kidney, etc. things usually go smoothly.

    Unfortunately, despite our best efforts, some donors still decline the contact, while other contacts fail to live up to the offspring’s expectations. We have no way to control how a donor will respond and have to respect his right to privacy. The contact requests that don’t work out are certainly not due to lack of effort.

    Please keep in mind that we only offered anonymous donors up until 14 years ago. At that time, most donors didn’t necessarily expect to ever be contacted. Our donors today are very clear on the inevitability of future contact requests and most (even the anonymous ones) seem to be open to it in concept.

    Regards,

    Nicole
    California Cryobank

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